My anger: It's ONLY always about revenge fantasies

Dear Adinosaur,

Well, you might think I have a Huge Problem, But I THINK I am doing Fine. I THINK I am happy as a clam. But YOU are the one writing into Forums talking about how much help you need. So as BAD as I might be, wouldn't you Trade positions with me in a heartbeat?

And as for being a Troll... well, I have helped many people here on this Site, but I do reserve the right to decide who I want to try to help. You shouldn't call me a Troll simply because I rejected your application (you did specifically request ME, didn't you?) and because I was so impolite as to tell you Why I concluded that you might in fact be 'Hopeless" ... only referring to the very things that came out of your own mouth. Now if you don't want people to respond back to you about the unpleasant things about yourself that you have spoken of, then you should refrain from giving out information that might make you feel embarrassed when coming back at you.

Also, now that I think of it, NOW you are suddenly Demonizing Me, when just 2 days ago, you were all praises for Me. I had felt quite flattered! The Posts are still there -- about how wonderful you think Leo is. This indicates that you are very, well, Unstable. Yes, I gave you some criticism. But look how you Reacted! This would Tend to Indicate that probably Most of the People whom you have decided to Plot and Scheme against are probably just as innocent (or so little guilty) as myself, and that you may have something of a paranoia thing going on, although that isn't my specialty. Maybe I should not use the word 'Paranoia' but simply say that you seem very touchy to an extremely vindictive extent. Maybe Paranoia refers to an actual Cognitive Dissonance where you don't really SEE and HEAR what is actually Happening and being Said, but that you super-impose your own Imagined Content on your Perceptions, in a way Obscuring Actual Reality. Well, that might be happening to you. We will have to watch you and see if you continue to speak irrationally.

Dude forget about what Leo said. I don't trust posts with weird, inconsistent capitolization.

I agree with Richard. The only eay to rise up out of a low mental state is to pull yourself up through meaningful, productive action. If you feel easily slighted or insecure about stuff (and we all do, we are humans) then rechannel that negative energy into something positive. Honestly dude, if I was in your spot I would take an hour and sit down with a pen and a notebook and write out the top goals you would like to achieve. Or, write a paragraph about the person you would like to be, and then figure out some goals that will move you in that direction. Then, every time you feel anger or frustration, do your best to breathe a bit (I know you said you hate cliches but deep breathing helps so much man) and refocus on working on one of you goals. It could be something simple like going to the gym, playing with your dogs, drawing, playing music, or whatever your passions and hobbies are.

When you are existing in a state of anger and resentment, it's like you are allowing yourself to be filled with poison, and you walk around like that and it will come through in every interaction you have. Honestly it sounds like you have a long history with this anger, and that's understandable given your family history and the loss of your dad. Sorry to hear about that man. But the point is you will continue to have this shitty, painful experience of life until you learn to LET GO of your pain. This is what forgiveness is all about, not saying that what the other person did is okay, but saying that you won't allow it to bother you. It is 100% in your mind and you can totally change if you work on it.

Sometimes I get in really defensive moods where I have very little tolerance for people and their jokes or whatever, and in these times I feel like letting it go shows weakness or me being a bitch or something like that, maybe you feel this way too. But it's the opposite of the truth. The biggest people who achieve the most in life will tend to be really good at letting things go. Life is really short man and you have been blessed with being prone to anger. We all get dealt our hands in life and have to play them out the best we can, so I know it's possible for you to overcome your resentment man. I believe that the key is to let go of that negativity as soon as you start to noice it (breathing and meditation help me tons here, do you actually meditate?) and then refocusing your negative energy into an area where you truly want to grow as a person.

Sorry for the long post but I hope it helps. Best of luck man, fight the good fight

slick_willy wrote:Dude forget about what Leo said. I don't trust posts with weird, inconsistent capitolization.

I agree with Richard. The only eay to rise up out of a low mental state is to pull yourself up through meaningful, productive action. If you feel easily slighted or insecure about stuff (and we all do, we are humans) then rechannel that negative energy into something positive. Honestly dude, if I was in your spot I would take an hour and sit down with a pen and a notebook and write out the top goals you would like to achieve. Or, write a paragraph about the person you would like to be, and then figure out some goals that will move you in that direction. Then, every time you feel anger or frustration, do your best to breathe a bit (I know you said you hate cliches but deep breathing helps so much man) and refocus on working on one of you goals. It could be something simple like going to the gym, playing with your dogs, drawing, playing music, or whatever your passions and hobbies are.

When you are existing in a state of anger and resentment, it's like you are allowing yourself to be filled with poison, and you walk around like that and it will come through in every interaction you have. Honestly it sounds like you have a long history with this anger, and that's understandable given your family history and the loss of your dad. Sorry to hear about that man. But the point is you will continue to have this shitty, painful experience of life until you learn to LET GO of your pain. This is what forgiveness is all about, not saying that what the other person did is okay, but saying that you won't allow it to bother you. It is 100% in your mind and you can totally change if you work on it.

Sometimes I get in really defensive moods where I have very little tolerance for people and their jokes or whatever, and in these times I feel like letting it go shows weakness or me being a bitch or something like that, maybe you feel this way too. But it's the opposite of the truth. The biggest people who achieve the most in life will tend to be really good at letting things go. Life is really short man and you have been blessed with being prone to anger. We all get dealt our hands in life and have to play them out the best we can, so I know it's possible for you to overcome your resentment man. I believe that the key is to let go of that negativity as soon as you start to noice it (breathing and meditation help me tons here, do you actually meditate?) and then refocusing your negative energy into an area where you truly want to grow as a person.

Sorry for the long post but I hope it helps. Best of luck man, fight the good fight

Hey dude,

Thanks man. You sound real and I can totally relate with that.

Lol don't worry. As said, I am not gonna feed the troll. It took me a tiny bit, but from looking at Leo's posts, it's pretty obvious he's only here to get attention.

Yes! I like what you said man. Indeed, I have had a long history with anger.

I didn't like cliches for a long while, but yeah, I am trying new sh** out now.

I guess it was hard because in a sense, I've been grieving still. The loss of my dad has made me feel revengeful, like straight up "I have to deal with this permanent damage which I can never reverse. And so my values can't be wavered for others, especially dickheads."

Yeah.

I am trying new sh** out now. It helps to know others feel the same.

So thanks dude! I was left with a bad taste with this forum (cause of an obvious reason), but yours certainly brought back some hope.

aldinosaur wrote:...I have to deal with this permanent damage which I can never reverse.

The above is what you believe.

First, you must believe you have damage. Then you must believe it cannot be reversed.

Our physical bodies are fairly resilient. We get a few bumps and bruises, but we heal. Other than the natural process of aging, permanent damage is rare. Equally our brains are resilient. There is the concept of neuroplasicity. Research on children with brain damage have demonstrated that the brain is capable of rewiring. Experiments on animals have also demonstrated a remarkable capacity for the brain to heal.

Why do you want to believe you have permanent damage? Once again, self-handicapping. There is a comfort in your anger, replacing some fear. For instance, you struggle with a task to improve your business, that generates fear, that then triggers anger where you hide, gaining a false sense of empowerment as you think of revenge.