EmperorDude2 wrote:What?? What does being mad at her or others have to do with guts?
Many times anger, frustration and anxiety is misplaced. It is very common and natural to want to maintain our own feelings of self-worth. You are stating you don't know if you have the guts, your hands would be shaking. This is a red flag for misplaced anger. You don't have the capability, i.e you don't have the guts and because you don't have the guts you get angry at others.
This kind of thought process will hold you back not only in this situation, but in other areas of life. One day you will want to apply for a promotion, take a risk, etc. and instead of focusing inward at your own lack of ability, you will channel that anger outward towards your boss or the person that received the promotion, etc.
Just food for thought.
Yes, i've deleted her about 3 days before starting this topic, joined a music competiton, been working on it up to 3 AM every day, its 9 minutes long now, been playing a heck ton of games i've never played before, can't believe i missed all of them on all this time, been studying math like a mindless slave, any kind distraction works, for a time.
All great activities to refocus.
How is going out with other girls going to help again?
Because no matter how many video games or how much studying, this does not fill the hole in Maslow's hierarchy of needs, the need for belonging. You feel rejected. Video games won't replace that feeling. Tonight, go on FB and send out messages to 20 different girls, even ones in which you have no real interest. Communicate, compliment them, even flirt a little. Some will reject you, but a few will begin to talk with you and it will slowly build not only your confidence, but it will start slowly meeting that need....we all have that need.
I do not owe her any apologies, she is the one who has been the cold, rude, ruthless bitch from the very beggining. Not only that, i don't want to repeat the same mistake of being nice to her and have her slap me in the face right after!
Which brings us full circle to why on earth if she is such a ruthless bitch do you want anything to do with her? If she is not a good person, you should recognize whoever she ends up with will be miserable. It is lust being driven by rejection, wanting what you can't have. It is all testosterone, no common sense. And don't feel bad about it...you're a normal, healthy 17 year old, but don't think you are going through anything special either.
The base advice remains the same. Move on. Find some other girls to talk with and develop friendships. The sooner you do the better.