seeingthelight wrote: It's not that I don't want all those things in life. When you don't have your life together though, you really can't be there for someone else the way you'd like to
Two things to consider:
-1- Your life is already “together”. It is a false premise to say you don’t have your life together, because you do have a certain amount of “together” that allows you to accomplish certain goals. You have your life together to the extent you can accomplish X or Y or Z. You have your life together as to be capable of accomplishing this or that goal. What a person means to say when they use a general statement of not having their life together, it means, “I am not yet prepared to accomplish goal E or F.” In your case E being marriage. What “together” means is something different for each individual.
-2- The process of getting your life “together” may in fact change your goals. Maybe goal E is not right for you? As we proceed towards a goal for which we believe we are not ready, we may discover other opportunities in life, other goals we would rather achieve than the original goal E.