Richard@DecisionSkills wrote:
How should we teach people to manage their fears? By hiding?
May I please interject?
How DO we teach people to manage their fears?
Well, there are Two Kinds of Fears. 1) Unjustified. 2)Justified
With unjustified fears, well, we can apply forms of Cognitive Therapy to address that sort of thing, stressing the importance of clearly looking at the situation and attempting to actively dispute the rationales one has taken up that drive the fear.
But with justified fear, where there is actually something dangerous or clearly harmful hanging on the horizon, well, we DO actually suggest a form of 'hiding'. In Anger Management when an Angry Person has a realistic fear that certain triggers will cause a Blow Up, it is part of the standard advise to counsel 'Avoidance' which is a form of 'hiding'. it would take perhaps years of Work on one's Anger Issues before one can be thoroughly trusted to behave nonchalantly in situations which had previously cause major eruptions. Yes, having a Good Attitude about trying not to get Angry is a positive thing, but Good Attitude doesn't Play the Violin, and it doesn't Behave Calmly, not without a lot of practice, practice, practice. Oh, and for None Angry People who have chronically Angry People among their acquaintance but who have no actual necessity for interacting with a them, well the advise has always been to simply 'avoid' or we could say 'hide' from them. ...Well, perhaps there are some New Age Zealots out there who would suggest going forward with Loving Hugs, but such a thought would make a normal person's skin crawl.
Then we must consider that there is really nothing shameful about hiding. People often hide from Clowns, Mimes, Panhandlers, Pollsters, Hare Krishna People, Ex-Spouses, sometimes Present Spouses given the situation, and the list goes on and on. Foxes are famed for their slyness but also for the holes they hide in.
But, yes, in this Present Situation where we are debating whether somebody should 'hide' behind anonymity in order to go forward with Not Minding His of Her Own Business, well that seems a bit convoluted. If you simply Did Nothing, then there would be Nothing to Fear. So what is wrong with simply Doing Nothing? William of Ockham would probably highly recommend such a course of none action.
Oh, and I remember a few years back when Group Interventions were really a Big Idea. What happened to them? Oh, now I remember what Richard had said yesterday. to have a Group Intervention one would need a Group, and, well, the Age of Social Media has redefined Groups to being On Line Things that have to be accessed using a Telephone that costs as much as a widescreen TV. Real flesh and bone people are now a part of a Reality that people only tune out, like ants at a picnic. In the Modern World of course it would be necessary to have an APP that could address any concern when we are forced off line into having to interact with that Gross and Unfiltered World out there that the Millennial Generation has not yet learned how to totally avoid, or I should say 'hide' from.
What an Age we live in when just a Moderately Old Man, such as myself, without stepping out of a Time Machine, can find himself in a Society, in a Land where he grew up, which is foreign and whose Values he holds in contempt. Well, at least I have a house I can hide in.