To "love myself"

**Posts:** 3 · by **Sovereign** » Fri Dec 18, 2015 9:09 pm

In an earlier post I talked about something that happened a few weeks ago. I was talking to a friend while driving around and he asked "do you love yourself". "Love myself? What the hell does that mean?" I didn't have a response so I told him no.

Reflecting on this past year, I have made tons of mistakes. I have always blamed myself for things not turning out the way I pictured but someone said something great to me. I have done the best I could with the situations I've been in. I've done what anyone else would have done, and that's it. There's no reason to blame myself or anyone else for that matter. People are selfish, yes, but that is because they want to be happy. That's all anyone wants. If you get hurt or hurt someone during this journey called life (sorry to be cheesy) then that's fine because all anyone is trying to do is figure shut out.

You need to be happy with yourself before you can be happy with someone else. What I mean is go out and get food by yourself, figure out what your beliefs and values are, your hobbies and interests. This is the stage I am at right now.

Now, finding someone to love isn't the reason I'm working on myself (trust me- I am done with romance for a very long time). Do it because it feels damn good!

Can anyone relate to what I am saying? Does anyone have this issue? Can anyone explain what it means to love yourself?

**Posts:** 1299 · by **bert_ernie** » Fri Dec 18, 2015 11:35 pm

i guess there's various ways to look at this.

one way is to look at how do you treat yourself? & how would you treat someone other than yourself who you love? Some people can be much harsher on themselves than they would be on others in the same situation.

similarly, how do you talk to yourself? how do you look after yourself? do you look after yourself? just paying attention to all these things. & contrasting how you would think or feel if you saw someone else treating someone in this way.

& if when you see the totality of all these things, just imagining how a person would feel if you were to treat them that way. & what sort of human would they turn out to be. because of course sometimes being firm or angry or any amount of things you wouldn't normally associate with love could i suppose spring from love. if behaving in that way would help the human grow into a stronger, happier, balanced human.

but more simply love would be accepting, encouraging, inspiring. those sorts of things. imagine how you would treat a small shoot in an arid land to enable it to grow into a fully grown plant. then imagine you are that seedling or plant.

**Posts:** 330 · by **cynthialeighton** » Tue Feb 09, 2016 11:09 pm

bert_ernie wrote:but more simply love would be accepting, encouraging, inspiring. those sorts of things. imagine how you would treat a small shoot in an arid land to enable it to grow into a fully grown plant. then imagine you are that seedling or plant.

As you imagine this, make some notes on what specific actions you could take that would fit for you.

If you were that seedling, what kind of sunshine, water, fertilizer would you need?

How could you translate that into action you could take this month, this week, today -- and right this moment?

Loving yourself is important. It goes beyond doing your best as you go through the journey of life -- it requires that you put on a filter of taking specific actions that nurture you.

**Posts:** 104 · by **jenn_** » Wed Feb 10, 2016 4:34 am

I love this video about self love

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7F6GY5IO5VU

**Posts:** 84 · by **hubertkoh** » Thu Mar 03, 2016 12:37 pm

Self love is very important. Look out for my thread on 101 uplifting affirmations for self-love!

**Posts:** 46 · by **tijmenklip** » Sun Mar 06, 2016 8:58 pm

Damn right!

I started doing this after a bad break up. And going through that road of developing and exploring me as a person have gotten to so many good places.

I have a good job, a cool girlfriend, good friends, happy family, health and wealth,.... but I still won't stop developing and exploring myself! It is a life long path! You are doing great and am happy you are getting positive results!

**Posts:** 263 · by **handheart** » Fri Mar 18, 2016 5:32 am

Well blaming yourself its a bad mistake and unfortunately many people do .When you blame yourself you give autosugestion to your brain that you are weak ,you are no good ,you are fool etc .And guess what ,brain will give you the results that you created .Also liking yourself means accepting you as a person and feeling good in your person and having confidence in you

**Posts:** 1 · by **edcww** » Tue Apr 26, 2016 3:21 am

Its very important to identify your self esteem triggers to maintain balance in your self.

**Posts:** 6 · by **jaimeculpepper** » Tue Apr 26, 2016 5:23 am

Very nice video jenn. Thanks for sharing.

To "love myself"

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