Before starting off, i would like to say i'm not making this thread to argue wither or not non-black women are racist because i've already had this debate countless times with other people and i've gotten tired of arguing about it. So here is the situation...
I have a problem that might cause me to kill myself within the next 2month and possibly others might get hurt...
I am a 23yo black male with social phobia. I have an incredibly high-intamcy drive and desires that make me literally obsess over attractive girls that i see in public daily. Over the last year I developed a severe anger problem towards fair skin women (white,hispanic,asian etc). When i see them in public i have internal-anger outbursts because i believe they are racist due to social conditioning from white society therefore they wouldn't want to date me because I am a black male. I didn't used to have these beliefs.
These beliefs came from ONLINE and OFFLINE places where i observed these women display their socially condioned racial preference of dating white guys significantly more than black males. Another place where i learned non-black girls don't like black guys is from statistical studies conducted by popular dating sites and offline speed dating.
I won't list all these things that made me come to these conclusions because it will make a lengthy post that strays off topic. But here is a few - I saw a statiscial study conducted by dating sites which showed black guys get least response from non-black women while white guys recieved the highest from women of all races execpt black women. Another is in public i see Asian women always with white guys but rarely ever with black or latino guys.
I get so angry every minute of the day that i start having suicidal and violent thoughts. When it's gets over the top and i had enough i would shout at girls and call them "racist B*tches!" or sometimes flicking off a random girl (these girls would be strangers in public i never seen before). But the worst is when when the anger episodes become too painful to bear and i become hopeless, suicide then becomes the only way out. I've been enduring this breakdowns for such a long time now and i made plans put this deal to rest within the next 2 month. I've been putting of few expenses in order to save money for a weapon to kill myself if i have to.
I feel like if i am able to control my anger or accept these women's racial preference i would be able to cope better. The hard thing, is that i've been trying so much but not getting far because it's difficult to do this by myself. This is why i'm looking to see if someone would be able to chat with me regularly for guidance on dealing with this. I feel like i have a very few short time to live.
I am not here to debate wither these women are racist or not. I've already had this debate countless times with countless people and getting tired of arguing about this. I am just here to try to find a personal mentor or someone who would like to speak privately with me about this issue to resolve it. I feel like i will have to either have to accept this thing or bad things will happen to me.
Looking for someone to help me out
11 posts
• Page 1 of 1
by osenych » Sat Nov 26, 2016 6:02 am
Hi Moses,
I am not a professional therapist, counselor or anything like that. But I will be happy to talk whenever you need it and offer whatever support I can in this situation. My e-mail address is osenych[at]gmail Feel free to e-mail me whenever you feel like it and tell me whatever comes to your mind. I am here to listen.
Let me offer a little bit of my perspective on this situation. I am not going to argue with you about whether non-black women are racist or not. What I would like you to consider is that even if 99 percent of them are, there is still that 1 percent of women out there who don't care about the color of your skin. And who knows, maybe the love of your life might be among that 1 percent?
So by cutting off a non-black woman as soon as you see her, you are cutting your chances of finding love and romance. Because you will never know whether that person is racist or not until you talk to her openly and without judgement.
I know that intellectually you might already understand what I'm getting at here. It's the "implementation" that is very hard. But hopefully this insight will help re-frame your perspective a little bit.
I really think that you would benefit a lot from talking to a professional about your emotional issues, because I would hate to see such a wonderful human being as you take his own life without giving yourself a fair chance of recovering from these anger problems.
In any case, I am here for you to talk and to listen.
Olga
I am not a professional therapist, counselor or anything like that. But I will be happy to talk whenever you need it and offer whatever support I can in this situation. My e-mail address is osenych[at]gmail Feel free to e-mail me whenever you feel like it and tell me whatever comes to your mind. I am here to listen.
Let me offer a little bit of my perspective on this situation. I am not going to argue with you about whether non-black women are racist or not. What I would like you to consider is that even if 99 percent of them are, there is still that 1 percent of women out there who don't care about the color of your skin. And who knows, maybe the love of your life might be among that 1 percent?
So by cutting off a non-black woman as soon as you see her, you are cutting your chances of finding love and romance. Because you will never know whether that person is racist or not until you talk to her openly and without judgement.
I know that intellectually you might already understand what I'm getting at here. It's the "implementation" that is very hard. But hopefully this insight will help re-frame your perspective a little bit.
I really think that you would benefit a lot from talking to a professional about your emotional issues, because I would hate to see such a wonderful human being as you take his own life without giving yourself a fair chance of recovering from these anger problems.
In any case, I am here for you to talk and to listen.
Olga
by Richard@DecisionSkills » Sat Nov 26, 2016 8:21 am
Moses,
Why are you only focusing on race?
Are you saying you are a tall, young, athletic man with a full head of hair, great career, solid values, and charming personality? You are saying that out of everything that makes a person an appealing partner, being black is your greatest liability?
Probably not. Out of all the things a woman might find attractive, race is only a single factor. Most likely you have other liabilities that are much more a turn off than your race. What are those other liabilities? Lack of self-esteem/self-confidence? Anger issues?
The reason I ask is that while certainly there are a host of liabilities...we all have our liabilities, there is not some single liability that holds any person back from finding a partner.
I travel a lot and I find my liabilities differ dependent on the region of the world. In Central and South America my age is not a liability, while in Asia it is a greater liability and in the United States it is downright not worth my time. In India I had multiple liabilities. Was I suppose to start yelling at Muslim/Hindu women for not being interested in me? All they could see was my skin color and how I was dressed. Those b**ches! Right?
Bottom line, I think your anger is misplaced and a way to distract yourself from other liabilities you have. Race is probably not your biggest liability, but it is an easy one on which to focus your attention.
Why are you only focusing on race?
Are you saying you are a tall, young, athletic man with a full head of hair, great career, solid values, and charming personality? You are saying that out of everything that makes a person an appealing partner, being black is your greatest liability?
Probably not. Out of all the things a woman might find attractive, race is only a single factor. Most likely you have other liabilities that are much more a turn off than your race. What are those other liabilities? Lack of self-esteem/self-confidence? Anger issues?
The reason I ask is that while certainly there are a host of liabilities...we all have our liabilities, there is not some single liability that holds any person back from finding a partner.
I travel a lot and I find my liabilities differ dependent on the region of the world. In Central and South America my age is not a liability, while in Asia it is a greater liability and in the United States it is downright not worth my time. In India I had multiple liabilities. Was I suppose to start yelling at Muslim/Hindu women for not being interested in me? All they could see was my skin color and how I was dressed. Those b**ches! Right?
Bottom line, I think your anger is misplaced and a way to distract yourself from other liabilities you have. Race is probably not your biggest liability, but it is an easy one on which to focus your attention.
- Richard@DecisionSkills
- MVP
- Posts: 12131
- Joined: Sat Dec 08, 2012 2:25 am
- Likes Received: 1271
by Leo Volont » Sat Nov 26, 2016 9:52 am
Wow!
Hi Moses.
You are SO lucky to get Osenych and Richard's Replies. When I read your post, you had ME so focused on Race that I couldn't think of anywhere else to go with it. And I am probably like most other people... if you Talk about Race, well that is all anybody can Think about after that.
Oh, and I was thinking -- you know, Talking is not the Only Way to 'express' Race. You need to see how you Walk, how you Dress, what kind of language and style of speech you use. What I am saying is that People might not have a Problem with Blacks, but might have a Big Problem with 'Ghetto' and the whole 'Ghetto', "Gang", never had an Honest Job, and "In and Out of Jail" Culture. It isn't just Black. With the Popularity of Hip Hop and Rap Music, a lot of White People have 'Gone Ghetto', and you can guess what kind of luck they have with White College Educated Women ... and with Hispanic and Asian Women who also Seek and are Drawn to the Aura of Respectability and the Standard of Western (and Now) Global Culture.
I can think of an Analogy -- England about 100 years ago, when there was Serious Class Division, and perhaps the primary Line of Demarcation distinguishing the Two Classes from each other was Accent and Style of Speech. You see, the Well to Do families sent their children to Boarding Schools where the children did not mix with anybody outside the School, and then they were inundated with Proper and Correct Speech... it was the 'School' Speech, and later came to be known simply as the 'RP' (Received Pronunciation) , and in the old days BBC Television would not hire anybody who did not strictly speak a good 'RP'. BUT, that did not stop some Ambitious and Upward Looking Commoners from the Working Class from taking Diction Classes and reading all the Fine Literature and studying up on How To Talk, and What To Talk About (and of course, what NOT to talk about). There were people who Totally Transformed themselves. And then as the 20th Century progressed, with Radio and then TV, more and more Working Class People CONSCIOUSLY decided to be Upwardly Mobile and dedicated a great deal of their time to Learning How to Act Noble. Suddenly the English Aristocracy was swamped in Good Copies of themselves. And Prince Edward married a Common Actress -- she seemed OK to him.
From that time I remember an interesting Story --- Once, a Lady in High Society was 'found out' ... it was discovered that she had fabricated a story of her Past and Family Connections and that she was actually a Cool Miner's Daughter from New Castle. When confronted with this Accusation, it was thought that she would be humiliated and defensive, but she simply said, "Oh, that!. I haven't been THAT person for years"... and she said it in a scathingly correct 'RP'.
So we are not some fixed and immutable Self. Our Persona can be reshaped. Maybe we can't Change Its Color (unless you are Michael Jackson), but our Personalities can be Taken Apart and Put back together Again in whatever Configuration we prefer. Maybe decades from now, when somebody mentions that you were the guy that all the girls avoided like the plague, you can say, "Oh, thatl, I haven't been THAT person in years".
Hi Moses.
You are SO lucky to get Osenych and Richard's Replies. When I read your post, you had ME so focused on Race that I couldn't think of anywhere else to go with it. And I am probably like most other people... if you Talk about Race, well that is all anybody can Think about after that.
Oh, and I was thinking -- you know, Talking is not the Only Way to 'express' Race. You need to see how you Walk, how you Dress, what kind of language and style of speech you use. What I am saying is that People might not have a Problem with Blacks, but might have a Big Problem with 'Ghetto' and the whole 'Ghetto', "Gang", never had an Honest Job, and "In and Out of Jail" Culture. It isn't just Black. With the Popularity of Hip Hop and Rap Music, a lot of White People have 'Gone Ghetto', and you can guess what kind of luck they have with White College Educated Women ... and with Hispanic and Asian Women who also Seek and are Drawn to the Aura of Respectability and the Standard of Western (and Now) Global Culture.
I can think of an Analogy -- England about 100 years ago, when there was Serious Class Division, and perhaps the primary Line of Demarcation distinguishing the Two Classes from each other was Accent and Style of Speech. You see, the Well to Do families sent their children to Boarding Schools where the children did not mix with anybody outside the School, and then they were inundated with Proper and Correct Speech... it was the 'School' Speech, and later came to be known simply as the 'RP' (Received Pronunciation) , and in the old days BBC Television would not hire anybody who did not strictly speak a good 'RP'. BUT, that did not stop some Ambitious and Upward Looking Commoners from the Working Class from taking Diction Classes and reading all the Fine Literature and studying up on How To Talk, and What To Talk About (and of course, what NOT to talk about). There were people who Totally Transformed themselves. And then as the 20th Century progressed, with Radio and then TV, more and more Working Class People CONSCIOUSLY decided to be Upwardly Mobile and dedicated a great deal of their time to Learning How to Act Noble. Suddenly the English Aristocracy was swamped in Good Copies of themselves. And Prince Edward married a Common Actress -- she seemed OK to him.
From that time I remember an interesting Story --- Once, a Lady in High Society was 'found out' ... it was discovered that she had fabricated a story of her Past and Family Connections and that she was actually a Cool Miner's Daughter from New Castle. When confronted with this Accusation, it was thought that she would be humiliated and defensive, but she simply said, "Oh, that!. I haven't been THAT person for years"... and she said it in a scathingly correct 'RP'.
So we are not some fixed and immutable Self. Our Persona can be reshaped. Maybe we can't Change Its Color (unless you are Michael Jackson), but our Personalities can be Taken Apart and Put back together Again in whatever Configuration we prefer. Maybe decades from now, when somebody mentions that you were the guy that all the girls avoided like the plague, you can say, "Oh, thatl, I haven't been THAT person in years".
-
Leo Volont - Senior Member
- Posts: 1152
- Joined: Wed Jan 21, 2015 8:26 am
- Likes Received: 146
by laureat » Sat Nov 26, 2016 11:34 am
i dont know what your target really is, because if you are looking for a woman to make you happy you would not really care if she is white, you would find a girl, and you would live happy
but if you are comming with ideas of being a "player" having sex with all the hot women around well that is a little tricky ,
a player most of times is a guy with lots of energy, and capable to convince the other he is something really special through a short conversation, not too different from a job interview
you have to know what they want from you, you have to be tricky making them feel they need you more than you need them,
you have to know tricks how to react when you get negative response, like going back and forwards, with the idea of getting a different response
and most of these kind of tricks people develop through experience even if they may not be aware of what they are doing, and explain that to others
i live at a place that 99% of women reject you no matter what, they just reject you as they have dating phobia because of arranged marriages used to be the way before, but you have to keep looking for the good moments, good tricks to somehow and make it easier for the woman to decide to go out with you,
but if you are comming with ideas of being a "player" having sex with all the hot women around well that is a little tricky ,
a player most of times is a guy with lots of energy, and capable to convince the other he is something really special through a short conversation, not too different from a job interview
you have to know what they want from you, you have to be tricky making them feel they need you more than you need them,
you have to know tricks how to react when you get negative response, like going back and forwards, with the idea of getting a different response
and most of these kind of tricks people develop through experience even if they may not be aware of what they are doing, and explain that to others
i live at a place that 99% of women reject you no matter what, they just reject you as they have dating phobia because of arranged marriages used to be the way before, but you have to keep looking for the good moments, good tricks to somehow and make it easier for the woman to decide to go out with you,
- laureat
- Senior Member
- Posts: 1554
- Joined: Fri Aug 24, 2012 10:45 pm
- Location: Kosovo
- Likes Received: 117
by Leo Volont » Sun Nov 27, 2016 10:13 am
Dear Laureat,
'Player Advice!' You know I thought of that... but it seemed too tacky -- giving advice on "How To Bag Chicks".
But it can be funny. One of my Favorite Minor Characters in a Good Movie was Morris Man (of the Band "Morris Man and Time") in Purple Rain. That guy was a "Playa" In one of my favorite scenes his sidekick tells him he should call some new pretty girl on the scene, and Morris says, "Call her!? Hey, I don't call no bisschess... the bissschess call me."
But, seriously, the Dating Scene is Populated with Two Sorts -- the First Sort is Looking for Marriage or Lasting Relationships, and the 2nd Sort is looking for Sex as Sport. Now, yes, Women can be very predatory too, BUT if They Only Knew How Objectified and Minimized they are -- They are often no more important than a Notch on the Bedpost... and most guys find the Girls SO unimportant, they don't even bother to keep count anymore. The Women who can Guess at how Belittled they are in these Men's Minds, well, they would certainly Resent It. And then they would Resist It.
and then there are people who Don't Realize that their are 2 Sorts out there... they probably believe that Everyone Plays Around until they have a one night stand with the Right Person... yes, some people don't really think things through, but they just think what they happen to start out thinking in the first place. I had a friend, he was a Psychologist -- and educated man! He was giving me advice on How To Impress Women on Dates. I had to explain that I did not WANT to impress them! I wanted to be polite and respectful (as I normally am, by the way), but to basically act like I would consistently act in the future if we were to have a Relationship. You see, Scheming and Plotting on how to Make Someone Like You with Tricks and Masquerades ... well, unless you Really Are Planning to Bail Out of the Relationship Early, that strategy will eventually back-fire on you. You Can't Keep It Up, and when you settle back into being Just You, it seems like a Betrayal, and must certainly be a Big Letdown.
But I have a feeling Moses is just the Playa Sort. In a way it feels kind of Sleazy giving him advice. If he was a White Guy who wrote in for advice on how to score on Black Girls I wonder whether we would all be doing flips and somersaults through all the Hoops to help him out. I guess he is used to generating sympathy from being Black, or he wouldn't be mentioning it all the time.
'Player Advice!' You know I thought of that... but it seemed too tacky -- giving advice on "How To Bag Chicks".
But it can be funny. One of my Favorite Minor Characters in a Good Movie was Morris Man (of the Band "Morris Man and Time") in Purple Rain. That guy was a "Playa" In one of my favorite scenes his sidekick tells him he should call some new pretty girl on the scene, and Morris says, "Call her!? Hey, I don't call no bisschess... the bissschess call me."
But, seriously, the Dating Scene is Populated with Two Sorts -- the First Sort is Looking for Marriage or Lasting Relationships, and the 2nd Sort is looking for Sex as Sport. Now, yes, Women can be very predatory too, BUT if They Only Knew How Objectified and Minimized they are -- They are often no more important than a Notch on the Bedpost... and most guys find the Girls SO unimportant, they don't even bother to keep count anymore. The Women who can Guess at how Belittled they are in these Men's Minds, well, they would certainly Resent It. And then they would Resist It.
and then there are people who Don't Realize that their are 2 Sorts out there... they probably believe that Everyone Plays Around until they have a one night stand with the Right Person... yes, some people don't really think things through, but they just think what they happen to start out thinking in the first place. I had a friend, he was a Psychologist -- and educated man! He was giving me advice on How To Impress Women on Dates. I had to explain that I did not WANT to impress them! I wanted to be polite and respectful (as I normally am, by the way), but to basically act like I would consistently act in the future if we were to have a Relationship. You see, Scheming and Plotting on how to Make Someone Like You with Tricks and Masquerades ... well, unless you Really Are Planning to Bail Out of the Relationship Early, that strategy will eventually back-fire on you. You Can't Keep It Up, and when you settle back into being Just You, it seems like a Betrayal, and must certainly be a Big Letdown.
But I have a feeling Moses is just the Playa Sort. In a way it feels kind of Sleazy giving him advice. If he was a White Guy who wrote in for advice on how to score on Black Girls I wonder whether we would all be doing flips and somersaults through all the Hoops to help him out. I guess he is used to generating sympathy from being Black, or he wouldn't be mentioning it all the time.
-
Leo Volont - Senior Member
- Posts: 1152
- Joined: Wed Jan 21, 2015 8:26 am
- Likes Received: 146
by moses199 » Mon Nov 28, 2016 2:48 am
Thanks guys i appreciate the advice here. I've been planning seeing a professional soon but i'm also trying to find someone else who i could talk with me individually regarding this matter. I'm not trying to secretly promote or advertise to anyone.
The reason why i'm looking for a personal peer is because i had another buddy i met on a different forum who was insightful on development. We used to talk on skype and over the phone. He helped me a lot however we have ended discussion due issues going on in his personal life. That's why i'm here trying to find someone else who i can speak to personally about solving this problem. Because i truly feel like i don't have much time before i have enough with this problem that drains my mind and soul every hour of the day.
If you are interested on doing this leave your email or skype.
My email is moses_chol2@yahoo,com or skype m.chol3
The reason why i'm looking for a personal peer is because i had another buddy i met on a different forum who was insightful on development. We used to talk on skype and over the phone. He helped me a lot however we have ended discussion due issues going on in his personal life. That's why i'm here trying to find someone else who i can speak to personally about solving this problem. Because i truly feel like i don't have much time before i have enough with this problem that drains my mind and soul every hour of the day.
If you are interested on doing this leave your email or skype.
My email is moses_chol2@yahoo,com or skype m.chol3
by moses199 » Mon Nov 28, 2016 3:04 am
Leo Volont wrote:Dear Laureat,
'Player Advice!' You know I thought of that... but it seemed too tacky -- giving advice on "How To Bag Chicks".
But it can be funny. One of my Favorite Minor Characters in a Good Movie was Morris Man (of the Band "Morris Man and Time") in Purple Rain. That guy was a "Playa" In one of my favorite scenes his sidekick tells him he should call some new pretty girl on the scene, and Morris says, "Call her!? Hey, I don't call no bisschess... the bissschess call me."
But, seriously, the Dating Scene is Populated with Two Sorts -- the First Sort is Looking for Marriage or Lasting Relationships, and the 2nd Sort is looking for Sex as Sport. Now, yes, Women can be very predatory too, BUT if They Only Knew How Objectified and Minimized they are -- They are often no more important than a Notch on the Bedpost... and most guys find the Girls SO unimportant, they don't even bother to keep count anymore. The Women who can Guess at how Belittled they are in these Men's Minds, well, they would certainly Resent It. And then they would Resist It.
and then there are people who Don't Realize that their are 2 Sorts out there... they probably believe that Everyone Plays Around until they have a one night stand with the Right Person... yes, some people don't really think things through, but they just think what they happen to start out thinking in the first place. I had a friend, he was a Psychologist -- and educated man! He was giving me advice on How To Impress Women on Dates. I had to explain that I did not WANT to impress them! I wanted to be polite and respectful (as I normally am, by the way), but to basically act like I would consistently act in the future if we were to have a Relationship. You see, Scheming and Plotting on how to Make Someone Like You with Tricks and Masquerades ... well, unless you Really Are Planning to Bail Out of the Relationship Early, that strategy will eventually back-fire on you. You Can't Keep It Up, and when you settle back into being Just You, it seems like a Betrayal, and must certainly be a Big Letdown.
But I have a feeling Moses is just the Playa Sort. In a way it feels kind of Sleazy giving him advice. If he was a White Guy who wrote in for advice on how to score on Black Girls I wonder whether we would all be doing flips and somersaults through all the Hoops to help him out. I guess he is used to generating sympathy from being Black, or he wouldn't be mentioning it all the time.
I wouldn't say i'm a player as in already played girls and experience relationships. I have severe social phobia disorder so i never could get relationship with girl even though i'm fairly alright looking. 6'3 and athletic. However yes, i have the mindset of "player" because i have a high intimacy drive which makes me obsess over all women.But i feel like this is cos i never had a relationship so i have a feeling when i start experimenting this obsession of women might go away.
The bad thing is my social anxiety disorder is so severe in level of worst patients that i don't feel like it will ever go away, therefore i feel i might obesse over women for longtime until i get old and lose testosterone no longer desiring women much. That's gonna be countless years though. I don't feel like i'm gonna even making it to that age because this anger problem is too much for me to handle and i plan on calling it quites really soon. I had plans to kill myself by end of this month but i got inspiration out of no where. Maybe it's god or maybe he doesn't exist. I don't know.
by Leo Volont » Mon Nov 28, 2016 4:09 am
moses199 wrote: I wouldn't say i'm a player as in already played girls and experience relationships. I have severe social phobia disorder so i never could get relationship with girl even though i'm fairly alright looking. 6'3 and athletic. However yes, i have the mindset of "player" because i have a high intimacy drive which makes me obsess over all women.But i feel like this is cos i never had a relationship so i have a feeling when i start experimenting this obsession of women might go away.
The bad thing is my social anxiety disorder is so severe in level of worst patients that i don't feel like it will ever go away, therefore i feel i might obesse over women for longtime until i get old and lose testosterone no longer desiring women much. That's gonna be countless years though. I don't feel like i'm gonna even making it to that age because this anger problem is too much for me to handle and i plan on calling it quites really soon. I had plans to kill myself by end of this month but i got inspiration out of no where. Maybe it's god or maybe he doesn't exist. I don't know.
Dear Moses,
I must apologize as it seems I got you completely all wrong. My guesses and assumptions were all off the mark. Now, it is my supposition that you are obsessed so Over the Top with Sex because you haven't had much of it.
yes, the Sex Drive is a bit Tyrannical when we are young, but as each decade passes, it loosens its bonds bit by bit. Now that I am in my Sixties, I am hardly bothered by it. and that is a Good thing! Most people get into Dysfunctional Relationships because the One Thing the two can agree upon is to Sometimes have sex. And even then... when Relationships go sour, and words are said, and insults thrown back and forth, one often finds that it is exactly One's Partner who is the Last Person in the World one would want to have Sex with. anyway, at My Age it becomes Easy to be Cautious about relationships, but Young People tend to Grab For what they can Get, and they often live to regret it.
Hmmmmm. Your obsession with Sex. How to put this delicately.... You must realize of course that you do not need a Partner to have Sex. One of the Funniest Jokes I ever heard was a spoof on that Organization "Parents Without Partners" -- a very respected Organization for Single Parents... well, a Friend of mine said that most people he knew would better benefit by an Organization called "Sex without Partners".
There was a movie about that subject a few years back... it was embarrassing to watch, but one of the points that the Film stressed was that very often "Self Administered Sex" was better than Relationship Sex. With a Partner, one has to worry about the Needs and Attitudes of the Partner. and then there is the matter of personal embarrassment and performance anxiety. and in the Old Days the Code was Strict and everyone Minded It, and that was that "Nobody would Kiss and Tell" so to speak. Now, with Civilization crashing down all about us, you are never sure what a person might do. Someone might Write a Book or broadcast it on Social Media what a crappy lover you are! SO, there are reasons why you would actually want to NOT have a partner.
BUT, there is perhaps One Way of Solving your Problem. Call Girls and Escorts -- the Classy Kind -- have a Strict Professional Code. they get Paid but then they are there for You, and they won't tell... for them it is just a job. But the better Ladies in that Profession can Pretend to be very interested in you as a person. Indeed, I have known some guys who were a bit spoiled by the Professional Girls and really stopped any 'real dating', -- if they ever 'Went Out' it would be with one of their Escorsts... usually a favorite who had good 'Dinner Conversation' skills. You know, guys can have a Favorite Escort. and if you are not Too Obnoxious, and can behave politely and with human consideration, well, you can be one of some Lady's Recognized Regulars -- the Lady will fill you in on her Calendar at certain set Intervals. that way you have No Worries about what to do or where to go on your 'Date Night'... it would be like Clock Work! Oh, and you could easily find a White Escort. It would not be the first time for her.
Of course, all of that can Get Expensive, but you haven't told us you are poor. You may be a Socially Awkward Billionaire for all we know.
anyway, thank you, Moses, for giving me another change. Sometimes it just takes a bit more talk to finally get the Picture right. I hope some of this advice might help... or at least help you think about it.
-
Leo Volont - Senior Member
- Posts: 1152
- Joined: Wed Jan 21, 2015 8:26 am
- Likes Received: 146
by laureat » Mon Nov 28, 2016 1:11 pm
@Leo Volont
Yeah
I think it is important if one manages to improve the social life, to make it easier for others to decide about, rather if its a date, a job interview, yeah
But player advice? I think one who is a player, most of times they are natural at it, they have lots of energy, problem solving skills, capable to make things work
Like if i go out with a woman, but than she tells you i am unsure, i am confused? So you have a woman who has changed the mind about it, a player is natural on that, resourceful, solving problems, making it work,
Yeah, i dont like the intentions someone try to score women but it still is important to develope social life skills and be capable to make things work for themselves,
Yeah
I think it is important if one manages to improve the social life, to make it easier for others to decide about, rather if its a date, a job interview, yeah
But player advice? I think one who is a player, most of times they are natural at it, they have lots of energy, problem solving skills, capable to make things work
Like if i go out with a woman, but than she tells you i am unsure, i am confused? So you have a woman who has changed the mind about it, a player is natural on that, resourceful, solving problems, making it work,
Yeah, i dont like the intentions someone try to score women but it still is important to develope social life skills and be capable to make things work for themselves,
- laureat
- Senior Member
- Posts: 1554
- Joined: Fri Aug 24, 2012 10:45 pm
- Location: Kosovo
- Likes Received: 117
by Leo Volont » Tue Nov 29, 2016 10:57 am
Dear Moses,
I was thinking... nowadays with so much unemployment, and young people living at home in their parent's basement (until they are 40!), well, Women may be more concerned then ever before about whether 'The Guy' has a good car, a good job, and wears nice cloths and good shoes.
Sol, this begs the Question... if you don't mind. What is your Economic Situation? What do you Drive? What is your Job? Where do you live? How do you dress?
You may be Constantly Shot Down because you simply can't get past any Woman's "Checklist of Requirements"
Yes, it is Terribly Mercenary for Women to Think about such things... as Love should have Nothing to Do with Material Considerations... but THIS is the Real World, and Sensible Girls have been applying such 'Measures' to their Men for Ages Immemorial. Guys can't take it personally. If you want to Play, then you need to get it All Lined Up -- the Job, the Car, the Cloths ... and until you are Set Up with all that, there is really No Reason for a Girl to ever talk to you. You know what I mean, don't you?
I was thinking... nowadays with so much unemployment, and young people living at home in their parent's basement (until they are 40!), well, Women may be more concerned then ever before about whether 'The Guy' has a good car, a good job, and wears nice cloths and good shoes.
Sol, this begs the Question... if you don't mind. What is your Economic Situation? What do you Drive? What is your Job? Where do you live? How do you dress?
You may be Constantly Shot Down because you simply can't get past any Woman's "Checklist of Requirements"
Yes, it is Terribly Mercenary for Women to Think about such things... as Love should have Nothing to Do with Material Considerations... but THIS is the Real World, and Sensible Girls have been applying such 'Measures' to their Men for Ages Immemorial. Guys can't take it personally. If you want to Play, then you need to get it All Lined Up -- the Job, the Car, the Cloths ... and until you are Set Up with all that, there is really No Reason for a Girl to ever talk to you. You know what I mean, don't you?
-
Leo Volont - Senior Member
- Posts: 1152
- Joined: Wed Jan 21, 2015 8:26 am
- Likes Received: 146
11 posts
• Page 1 of 1