We are quitting herb--after 18 years-Time to move on

Hi Brand New Day and Sunshine (love the names!)

You really sound ready to give up! Believe me, you will not regret it long term. Once you get through the next few weeks and you break those habits, those trigger moments, those cycles, you will feel SO free.

My husband and I smoked together for 20 years and gave up within a couple of weeks of each other. I don't think you can give up half as easily if both of you aren't on board, so another positive. However, because you'll both be feeling those tetchy, irritable vibes at the same time, might be good to give each other a bit of space for a while.

Good Luck! I truly wish you success because I don't regret giving up one bit and only wish I had done it years ago.

Take care

Hebes

I honestly don't know why tears are coming down my face as I read your response. Maybe because if I told any of my old herb smoking friends what I just posted they would have laughed at me---not to sound weak. Maybe because I know that you have gone through what we are about to go through and you know it will work out because you have been doing it. But thank you for reaching out and giving us encouragment. I am almost 36 and feel trapped by our herb smoking lifestyle. Sometimes I get so high so often just going to the bathroom is a pain. Sounds pathetic. If I talk with any of my family members they will say"we told you to stop smoking a long time ago"---in other words it will get thrown back in my face. The problem with us is we can get it anytime we want it with one phone call. But that is not going to be a problem because we have decided deep down inside of ourselves to quit---stop making all these excuses why we shouldn't---we were actually thinking about trying to get a house(we now rent) out on the outskirts just so we could grow----or it would have to be a house with a basement so we could grow our own. Our whole things was once we have our own place we won't waste any money anymore---we would just grow it and that would make it o.k.? Just another example of our minds looking into the future and trying to make sure it was a future with pot. The whole time we're feeling paranoid going to work the next morning after smoking and wondering why I feel so 'out of place' in my head. This would bring on anxiety and worry that simply didn't need to be there. My confidence goes way down---but I tell myself---but I play and write music so much better--wrong. And isn't it funny how I don't understand how people who don't smoke even cope with life. Sometimes I would see someone who was younger than me have so much more confidence than me---and that would make me feel bad because it means my life growth must be stunted---thanks to herb. Hebes--------thank you for listening and communicating and I'll show my wife what you wrote too. We will both have to work together and realize the next few weeks we won't be ourselves. We are really ready to quit.

right on man. This next month or so will be very difficult I won't lie to you. But it's a necessary pain. I'm a month in myself and I've been through so many emotions and feelings it's felt like half a year. But the journey has been worth it so far.

I was thinking of posting my story, but I think Brand New Day and Sunshin just did it for me.... honestly.... right down to the guitar....girlfriend, small town...you name it.... he's me? huh? I'm a bit caned now.... but I'm gonna knock it on the head right tomorrow... patches, anger management, space from people I could hurt while feeling down..(Not physically, I don't ever go there)... all these things don;t come easy to a breadwinner... even though winning more bread could be done be chucking in the $600 a month habit my partner and I have....

Very cool forum, will be visiting often.....

Best of luck to everyone here trying to knock smoking anything! Crack, weed, tabac, anything at all isn't good and will make you die quicker.... normally people would take great offence to someone else deciding how fast you die.... well it's YOU!


xxxx

Hey John no longer blaze---thanks for the support! We need it. This is still day one and the morning and afternoon were basically normal--but now I am getting pissed off at small stuff and looking to blame everything in my life(except ourselves) for even feeling this way. If my parents were such materialistic assholes, if my wifes parents werent queer, if it wasn't so easy to get, theres no good jobs around here so whats the difference. But then I realize my hands are sweating and my head is starting to get this dull pressure like my brain is realizing it doesn't have something it wants---WE ARE DETOXING. Yeah John no longer blaze your right---the next month is going to suck,but it is worth it-----------------thanks again and keep it up!

It's a damn good job it's so expensive... imagine the rut we'd be in if it was really really cheap, a kilo for a few bucks... at least this way there really is something to be gained...hey, I'd love an extra $600 in my monthly pay packet.... that's half the rent sorted!

Hey Heavy Stoner,
Looks like we are in the same boat! Being from a small town and spending too much money on weed. Your so right----nobody is making us do this over and over and over-but ourselves. Good luck to you on quitting tomorrow and good luck on getting space while working. I just want to tell you not to react to people and try to keep your head cool. I am home alone most of the day and that actually is helping in this detox process so far. I am worried about going to sleep and having bad vivid dreams---but it will be worth it Heavystoner if we can get through this mental mind ****. Its only day one and I have cried for no reason twice today--Iv'e been thinking about alot of things I haven't thought about in a while. I'm glad you posted and said you were me and it just goes to show that people outside my head are going through the same thing---it actually gives us more power to quit for good--------------hey---keep playing guitar----that creative feeling is bound to come back to us after a while----right now though-- I have conviced myself I need to get high just to get into that creative zone. But this is only day one for my wife and I and it is starting to suck-----we are going to keep posting and will look for you too----thanks again man!

if i can do this, if so many of us can do this, so can you! it is crazy hard, but i am making it through because i need to win this battle, not start it over. i think it will be nice to have each other to support you through this, as long as you are equally committed to persevering through the hard times.

life is so much more than being obsessed with weed!

i'm on day 33. the detox is going full speed. everything about my life feels up in the air. some other people on this forum do a lot better than i am on their day 33, others do worse as far as the detox. it is different for everyone!

i wish you peace and success in your journey. this forum is a lifesaver.
take care.
a.

Congrats on making to day 33!!!! Keep up the good work. We've tried this so many times before, but this is the LAST time. We are equally committed, it's time to get this devil out of our lives for good! We know it's going to be a tough road, but with the strength of each other, and the help of positive words like yours, will make it easier for us to get through this. This will be our first night without having it, not looking forward to what that will bring. But, each day making it through without giving in to the herb is a victory!!!!!!

As a former 35 year smoker on his 43rd day, I'm a living example of never quitting too late! Those first 1-2 weeks are hell, with mood swings and anger from not having your green pacifier to run to but hang in there and the benefits are waiting for you both! I can't believe that I lulled myself into believing that it enhanced my life, made me amusing and creative. IT WAS A LIE! I'm on the ride of my life now-everything is falling into place, my memory is back, I'm still as creative as before and sometimes better and I feel more alive than ever. I no longer hold stuff in, I've rekindled long lost relationships with non smoking friends that were left by the wayside,etc.,etc.,etc. IT IS WORTH THE SYMPTOMS YOU WILL ENCOUNTER FOR THE GREATER GAIN! Stay strong and don't give in and you will be amazed at the results

Hi Brand New Day and Sunshine, your story really touched me because of the similarities to my situation. I have not used cannabis for 11 weeks now and feel that I really have kicked the habit. In fact I felt this way after only a couple of weeks of abstinence.

I suppose it is mainly because I was just so totally sick of the routine of having a smoke before work, going to work, comimg home, rolling a couple of joints, smoking them whilst watching TV, having dinner, smoking a couple more joints in front of the TV, going to bed, and then getting up the next morning to start the routine all over again. After 30 years of this it was time to get a life!!

These days I go to the gym every day, eat healthy, have amazing dreams when sleeping (did not dream at all when using) and really enjoy having a clear head and getting my short term memory back. I now fully believe that these natural highs will prevent me from slipping back into the abyss. Don't get me wrong, I still kinda have cravings for the weed but they aren't the desperate, anxious, angry sort they were when I first went cold turkey. I just keep remembering how pathetic I was, not how good it would be to get stoned again.

Keep up the good work guys, all the benefits are there for the taking. Reach out and take big handfuls of pure life - it will just keep getting better and better for you, mentally, physically and financially. My heart and mind is with you on your courageous journey towards true happiness and wellbeing.

Hey Everyone,
Its day four for us and we feel really good about not smoking. My poster board is up with a big 4 on it and deep down we both feel proud of ourselves.The first night I UNFORTUNATELY argued withmy wife about stupid little things,woke up the next morning with what felt like a hangover. Our appetite has decreased and on night 2 we both had headaches so bad we literally couldn't believe the pain---seriously like a knife cutting into the sides of our heads. we have been sweating out our hands and feet?,getting hot/cold flashes,and basically felt like we have the flu. day 3 was like a dull overall headache that felt like someone taking a giant spoon and scooping out the top half of our brains. I thought so much about past family issues I thought I had resolved in my soul---GUESS NOT! my mind would just go over scenarios again and again. Still crying hear and there, and even cried today when I logged on and reviewed these posts. Went to Lowes over the weekend and couldn't believe how at ease I felt around all those people. I didn't feel like I was the center of attention and paranoid that straight clear headed people knew I was high.Do you know why---because I wasn't high! Ive been high for soooooo long that being clear headed felt like a fresh high------without the paranoid feelings,guilt,etc. My head today still has that dull headache to it as this is only day 4. I just want to tell the world... I AM NEVER GOING BACK...OH NO....OH NO! My self confidence is really gone up and now can't believe I felt so inferior. We decided this forum must be from god because it has made us feel so good to know we are in the same boat as you guys. For everyone who posted......thank you.thank you,thank you. I don't know how to say this---but we feel like we can feel you through your words, your spirit is on our side, and now our spirit is on your side----and we will continue to fight this battle TOGETHER.

I'm so glad the two of you are doing so well!!! It's nice to feel more in control of yourself, doesn't it? I'm lucky because I'm not having any physical symptoms (well, only good ones...) but I have had my share of mood swings. Oh and I've also been thinking back to unresolved issues that must have gotten "swept under the carpet" while I was smoking. I can't lie, I still have the urge to go back to my "hiding place" sometimes and I get angry when I hear of others who smoke. But then I think of the bad effects they will have and I remember that I no longer have to worry about those things. I had quit smoking cigarettes about a year ago so it didnt make sense for me to continue smoking weed, inhaling all that crap every day....I don't know if the two of you have children or not, but that was alos a big push for me. As we know, kids aren't dumb and my daughter would have eventually figured out what I was doing (she's only 9 months now). Plus, how can you tell a child not to smoke and then do it behind their back. I would have just felt like complete Sh*t.

I understand what you mean about the whole crying thing. It kept happening to me, especially in the first few days, I would just start to cry for no apparent reason. That has subsided....Now I keep getting this feeling of aggravation inside me, but I just wait for it to pass. It helps to call up a supportive friend, if you have one. I've already called my best friend numerous times, crying, telling her that I wished I was dead, just complaining that I was aggravated for no specific reason....It's good to just vent...Which I do on here as well! I also think that God sent me to this website...Wanna know something funny? When I decided to quit smoking butts, I found this same website, over a year ago. It was so comforting to hear from people who had smoked cigarettes for many many years and to hear how much happier they were. Then, a couple weeks ago when I was thinking of quitting the weed, I was googling different things and saw this site again...It looked so familiar to me and then I relaized that it was the same one that helped me before! So I really think it's a God-send.

I think it's normal if you end up bickering with your wife these days....Trust me, I've already had my share of b*tching to me boyfriend and being mean and saying mean stuff to him and my daughter. We always release our tension/temper to those we love the most, as we feel safe enough to do this. As long as you tell her (or she tells u) that she's sorry and you both know that it's only happening because of the tough journey you're going through, then everything will be fine! I have found that taking walks and practicing yoga and meditation has been helping to keep me sane!

Well, I must go but I'll be back eventually - Keep up the awesome work! You can do it! We can send our strength and positive vibes back and forth to each other!

Love and Peace

Day and Sunshine

You are doing exceptionally well! SO good to hear you're keeping it up with such positive results already.

I posted a pretty long post on Strengthtochange's thread yesterday about the weekend my husband and I have just have, if you get chance, have a quick scan of it, because it will explain more clearly than anything else, why I am so glad to be in the place I am, and not where I was ten months ago.

I hope you continue to flourish, so so pleased for you!

Take care now,

Hebes