by anonymous34352 » Sun Jan 24, 2021 11:37 pm
Well, I don't have.
But, it really hunts me because of the fact that I repeated it couple of times.
I didn't perform any sexual motions, nor touching the private parts. But I left kid in my lap, which made me errected. Firstly, it happened unintentionally. After that, I have done it with the purpose few times. Soon, I figured it out, and felt regret. Time passed by, and I have forgot it until some time ago. I guess I denied it very well.
I have done it couple of times with the intention and that is killing me.
I am was not attracted to the children, I didn't have any intention to make any true physical conntact, I "just" liked erection part.
I am trying to convince myself that I was just a stupid horny kid, however I am not able to overcome it. Going to speak with psychologist is not working for me, since I am not victim in whole situation. I mean, I am the one which deserve to be punished, not to be helped.
The most likely, girl (as far as I know, now meried woman), was not aware of this, maybe she had some thoughts in some point of her life, but was not sure. These things are hard to be proven, so maybe she didn't have courage to say something, who knows.
But even if it didn't have any affect, I should have known better.