Hi guys,
I've read a lot of stories on here over the last few months. It's been helpful to read other people's experiences going through PAWS and helped reassure me that I'm not going insane. However at 6 months in my brain fog is still a massive problem, I feel like I'm walking round in a zoned out zombie state, I feel like people at work must think I'm not quite all there as I still struggle to focus for more than a few seconds, I then become aware that I've lost focus and then get anxious about looking strange to other people.
I'm also still experiencing pretty bad social anxiety. When people are talking to me I have a hard time computing what they're saying, I'm then unable to think of anything to say so I just blurt out this awkward laugh as a reply. I find myself struggling to form sentences, and find the words I am looking for. Every social interaction just feels so forced.
I did get some enjoyment out of playing the guitar the other day which was great. But mostly I spend every day closely monitoring and analysing my thoughts and behaviour then endlessly googling symptoms of mental conditions trying to diagnose myself. I've self diagnosed myself with NPD, ADD, and autism over the last 6 months. I went to see my G.P and he has arranged an appointment with a psychiatrist. I really don't want to go on medication, but at least this way I will know if I do have some sort of condition. I feel as if perhaps I've done permanent damage to my brain or perhaps I just wasn't that intelligent to begin with.
I've recently got back in to meditating daily, exercising weekly and have just started Keto in the hope that I will regain some mental clarity, I just hate how slow I feel, it has had a drastic impact on my confidence.
Has anyone still felt like this at 6 months in? Any words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated.
All the best,
Baggyjeanzz