Hello,
I am a 22 year old virgin man. When I was about 7 or 8 I went to confession at church and the priest told me that masturbation was an extremely serious sin and that God killed Onan for doing it, so I should stop immediately if I want God to forgive me. Ever since that day I have felt a very strong guilt after every time I masturbated.
I researched a lot and I found out that Onan's sin wasn't masturbation, but the fact that he didn't want to have children, which is a totally different thing. I know all this now, but even if I know that he wanted to scare me so as I don't do it anymore, what the priest told me at that moment had been engraved so deeply into my mind that I simply can't get rid of it. I think it's in my subconscious and the guilt comes like a reflex.
I'm afraid that it will be the same with sex too. What is there I can do to change all this? (or maybe you also believe it is a sin?)
I really need help.
Thank you and have a Happy New Year