JuliusFawcett wrote:You write well enough on here...
There are several reasons for that, the first is that I am not under pressure and it's harder to write things when I am nervous. And I am trying to write in a way that is as detached and objective as possible - not what an English teacher wants, instead he wants everything to be deep and poetic and meaningful, which also means it is emotional and personal and therefore it is an invasive procedure to extract that from my brain (I've tried writing objectively before and he didn't like it so if he doesn't like my writing then he's not going to get any, objective or otherwise and I'd rather not write anything at all than write something which I know is going to make me cry later anyway when I develop an emotional connection to it in some way even though it's objective and detached as I can make it). And also I try to push away the emotion while I am writing on here which results in crying afterwards when I re-read my posts, or sometimes crying while I write them, or while I read your posts, or sometimes even when I read the title of the thread, or just at some random time when I am thinking about what I wrote on here, so now my mom is asking why I am crying for no apparent reason.