Dear Roady & Leo Volont:
You both have interesting points of view. I believe discovering what drives a person may help them to heal in some cases, but could make it worse in others. I don't know my exact reasons behind what I do, I just know that I do them and it makes me feel bad about myself. I would like to know why I am this way, simply for the sake of knowing. Although I'm not sure how much that would actually help me in the long run. I suppose different methods of coping and treatment only work on certain people, what works for some may not work for others.
I did have a bit of a set back though. Yesterday was my first angry day in a little while. I was in a hurry to get to town and I now bring the dog with me so that she doesn't poop in the house when I'm gone. She likes to ride in the car, and it's cold here now so no need to worry about her getting overheated while she waits in the car. Anyway I usually have her sit before I open the door to let her in, because when she's excited she likes to jump all over the car and can scratch it. I was being impatient and she wasn't paying attention or sitting so I grabbed her collar in an aggressive way and yanked her and told her to sit. I didn't hit her but I did scare her and she cowered. Anyway she sat and I rewarded her by letting her in the truck and she was happy again. There was a bit of tip toeing around me in the house later but I think I fixed it by just talking to her in a calm voice, after a little while she wanted to play.
I'm not going to lie and say that she's my favorite dog in the world or that I really enjoy her presence that much... she's quite rowdy and mischievous. But just because she is the way she is doesn't give me the excuse to hurt her or be mean and unfair. I want her to have a quality life, and she means a lot to my fiance so therefore she matters to me. I'm working on it, it's hard and I think she might benefit from working with a professional trainer. I've been watching some videos online about training to try and help the behavior as well.