moonlightress wrote: My replies haven’t been becoming, to the kind of person I strive to be.
moonlightress wrote:
Richard, you trawled around the internet looking for information...
...But I forgive you for that.
And again, the above is “becoming” of the kind of person you strive to be?
You do remember being critical of my opinion, because as you told me I didn’t know anything about you? Now you are critical because I know more about your past. And you wish to forgive me for discovering more about you? No wonder you find yourself in such untenable positions.
Moonlightress, you continuously set yourself up for failure. You experience a repetitive cycle of being a critic and then apologizing. Criticize, then apologize and explain to yourself that it is not who you wish to be. Criticize, apologize, criticize, apologize, repeat.
You being so kind as to forgive me, presupposes that I did something that needs to be forgiven. I didn’t. And that is what you struggle to grasp. That is where you struggle, believing that your stated failures to live up to your own expectations somehow transfer to others being a cause of that failure. In truth, if you take the time to reflect, your apologies and forgiveness are all about feeling, at least for a moment, like the person you say that you are striving to become.
Escape the cycle.
If you want to break the cycle, stop believing you are a bad or lesser person than you wish to be that needs to apologize and forgive. Stop setting up some false narrative that creates a gap between who you actually are and this ideal you in your mind. Learn to accept who you are.
