Sister's death

**Posts:** 6 · by **battleborn** » Fri Jul 14, 2017 8:22 pm

Hi. About month ago my sister died from unknown type of cancer. There was not really heavy crying. Maybe two times... One time when I saw her dead and other in funeral. I was trying to be strong as possible so I can support my mom. My sisters death have really changed me and my thinking...I know this is normal. But in last few days I think about my sister more and more. I feel that deep in side me is really big pain but it don't come out... And maybe I don't want to it go out. My wife will ask questions if I want to talk etc... And I don't want to talk about it with anyone who I know except my mom ( I talk to her only about this topic so I can support her). I hate when people give condolences when they really don't know how you feel... You can't understand how much pain it is when you lose sister or daughter. Simple hug or clap on shoulder is better than words who doesn't mean anything. Anyway... It feels wrong that only now I start to feel something more...

**Posts:** 12131 · by **Richard@DecisionSkills** » Fri Jul 14, 2017 8:28 pm

Sorry for your loss. I'm not sure what you are struggling with?

**Posts:** 216 · by **^_^** » Tue Jul 18, 2017 12:25 am

Two things I learned when I lost dear ones:
1) Only people who have actually lost someone know how to offer condolences.
2) Everybody mourns in his/her own way, yet most people expect you to mourn the same way as they do.
When I lost my father I didn't want to talk about with anyone either, so I can definitely relate to that. In my case it probably had something to do with the whole boys-don't cry attitude my father raised me with. I don't know, but obviously you might have your own reasons.

Anyway, who's to say which is the correct way of mourning? What a respectable time-table should look like, or which method best testifies off your love for her. In the end what's important is that you deal with these feelings in order to find a way to accept her death and continue to live a purposeful life. How? Whichever way you can.

**Posts:** 34 · by **angelal** » Tue Jul 25, 2017 6:06 pm

Dealing with the death of a loved one is one of the hardest things in life. I would recommend you talk to someone when you're ready. Leaving things bottled up is not a good idea. There needs to a release (ie., a grieving period)

Take care

Sister's death

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