wickthetrick wrote:I've even read that infants cry trigger a response from their parents nervous system and parents have adapted to become easily attached to their child. The child is equipped with a set of tools to survive from the very beginning.
Yes, that's the mainstream narrative which ignores the alternate narrative in which babies are punished or ignored when they cry, and the 'attachment' is based on abuse, neglect, or both. There are parents who routinely molest or batter their own infants until the child is dead.
I believe you're better off born to adoring parents without two pennies to rub together than to an upper-class family who believe children should be seen and not heard, and get the stick out for any minor infraction.
Financial security is a great help, of course, but emotional security matters more. For one thing, it provides a strong identity, a child who knows she or he is a good and competent person with the confidence to aim high and the resilience to understand the knock-backs aren't personal.
50 were born into an upper class family and 50 were born into a lower class family. I think that the upper class would thrive simply because of the situation they were born with.
Sure. If you were born to the Queen of England your life's 'work' will be shaking hands with various heads of state, cutting ribbons, and having tame lawyers on call for the times you're caught out indulging in the fruits of sex trafficking. It's certainly a
different experience, but not one I've ever fancied.
I don't think they'd want to change where they were placed because why would they?
Plenty of people 'marry down'. Whether they continue to have the support of their families is the luck of the draw.
some of the most successful people were born in lower class family's and have done really well for themselves so that shows its possible. But the large majority are not statistically going to do as well because they do not have the same foundation as the upper class. That's what I think at this point in time.
And at this point you can go either way. You can go on telling yourself the odds are against you, or you can read inspiring stories of people triumphing over adversity, financial and otherwise.
This
is "a fair universe": survival of the fittest. Evolution didn't end with Darwin, and if you can handle an update I highly recommend the work of his successor Richard Dawkins. You are NOT "far behind everyone else"; you have all the tools you need to make something fine of your life... except for the most important: the right attitude.
Aren't people making their decisions to make their situation more fair or to have more enjoyment? Aren't we all striving to help our own situation?
A lot of people have found more satisfaction in helping those less fortunate than themselves. Here's something to ponder:
https://www.elephantjournal.com/2013/07/534208/I don't think anyone would choose to have hurricanes.
So you're going to control the weather and distribute the world's income so everyone gets a fair share? I strongly recommend you decide which of these is more important to you and make it your life's work. You might end up being one of those people who everyone called crazy, but who left a great legacy for which the world is truly grateful.
I'm all for thinking big, but in your shoes (and because it seems to matter more to you) I'd aim for distribution of wealth rather than controlling the weather. Hurricanes and tsunamis are no respecters of persons: they just do what they do impartially.
If I had a hurricane tear through my house, I would go homeless, lose all of my belongings and I'd struggle for a long time. It wouldn't be fun at all. Perhaps i'd gain a new perspective to make me all the wiser. I'm not sure with what I'd gain.
I've been through all that, and you're quite right. It was more than 20 years ago and I'm never going to be where I expected to be in my old age, but it certainly does give a new perspective. In my case, it's the ability to stand back and watch it unfold. Somehow I've missed any mention in your posts of a global pandemic in which the poor and disenfranchised are being infected in greater numbers but the world's rulers are not immune. The financial shakedown will be colossal even if the northern hemisphere
doesn't see a surge of cases with the onset of winter. "Stand back and watch it unfold" isn't necessaily a position of helplessness; it enables a relaxed perspective that brings clarity.
How you are using unfairness to provide you with a source of motivation is something I just don't understand.
Is it fair that nowadays some people survive to adulthood with the most appalling congenital defects? I'm thinking in particular of Quentin Kenihan
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quentin_Kenihan, who didn't have a chance at a normal life but who was happy and successful within his limitations. I knew his parents, and they weren't wealthy by any means.
My message to you is to understand there are things you can control in life and things you can't. What you do with that information is up to you.