by J Derrington » Wed Mar 28, 2018 11:13 am
I think that the best way to achieve long term confidence on stage (and not just use tricks which are bandages over a hige problem) is to
1. Understand where this fear comes from
2. Take action
1. This fear comes from your underlying beliefs. Even though you might not be aware of it, you probably unconsciously believe that you have to be perfect for others to like you, that if you say something wrong people will think that you are stupid and will think less of you, that what you have to say is by default bad and you have to make an effort to monitor your every action... These beliefs were acquired as you were growing up, in school, through your parents, your peers, ... As a child you misinterpret people's criticism and anger towards you as signs that they will abandon you unless you are perfect.
2. You can only let go of these beliefs by taking action. Put yourself on stage as much as you can, face as many situations where you feel the same kind of fear. When you notice this fear, tell yourself that it is just your body trying to protect you from being rejected and abandoned (it believes all of the things I wrote above about you not being good enough). Don't trust the fear and do it anyway. Once you start to see that it is OK for you to be "imperfect" (the audience tends not to notice these imperfections), to make mistakes or even get confused. You will come to see that people want you to do well, and you will stop seeing the situation as scary or dangerous.