No one else stopped...

**Posts:** 1 · by **shikari** » Tue Nov 22, 2011 5:35 am

not really sure how to start this, but here it goes...

i was driving home from school about a month after i got my drivers license. i was on interstate I85, traffic was pretty packed, still moving well, just congested when up ahead about 75 yards i saw a silver jeep go rolling off to the side of the road the car must have rolled a good 3-4 times doing about 55-60 MPH. within minutes i was pulling out this girl (later i found she was 19)of the upside down totaled jeep Cherokee i noticed she had two gashes on her right side one on her head and one on her shoulder that was bleeding very badly so i took off my shirt and held pressure as i called 911. the girl was out cold when i got there. as i was waiting i really did not know what else i could do besides just hold pressure when i realized something i felt was very wrong... no one else stopped. i saw this from about 75 yards away i'm sure at least 30 other people saw this happen, 10 of them had to have seen it happen literally right in front of them even more drove by about 20-25 minutes later the ambulance arrives where one of the medics told me that if i had not slowed the bleeding she would have died from blood loss within 10 minutes, if not sooner. after the ambulance had left the police were asking me a bunch of questions but i could not stop thinking about how no one else stopped. have we really become this cold? i mean people are driving by and there's a 16 year old boy holding a 19 year old girl that's basically bleeding to death 10 feet from where more and more people are just driving by. and nobody else stopped ya know? how wrapped up in our own little worlds are we to the point where no one cares about the well being of anyone else about them self's? how important are our tiny little tasks like "oh i gotta get to a meeting...", "oh i gotta get to work..." i had places i had to go, but i stopped... its a fellow human being who very obviously needs a hand, but nobody else stopped... that's just sad...

this happened roughly 4 months ago and i have recurring nightmares litterally 5 out of 7 days of the week of this girl dying in my arms for all kinds of reasons, couldn't find my phone, w/e. but i keep getting the question running through my head "what if i did'nt stop?" that girl is someone's sister, daughter, granddaughter, best friend, roll model, etc. gone just like that. and no one else cares enough to stop.

i'm sorry if i'm getting too much into my personal life i just don't know.
is this really what man kind has come to?

**Posts:** 2122 · by **Herbie306** » Tue Nov 22, 2011 1:17 pm

Hi, I see this is your first post, so welcome

It is so sad, yes. I don't know whether people think that, because they aren't some kind of medic, they are not able to do anything. Others just freeze when they witness something like that. It's possible that they get tunnel-visioned whilst driving, wrapped up in their own worlds or maybe they just think it's someone else's job to stop and help. However, as you say, it's a really sorry state of affairs if the majority behaves in that manner.
It sounds as though you did brilliantly; you did stop, you did call 911 and you did stem the bleeding - that's what matters, and IMO you should be really proud of yourself.

**Posts:** 832 · by **Joobles** » Tue Nov 22, 2011 1:52 pm

The general public can appear to be very strange indeed. Many people feel they are not qualified to help, others are frightened, others simply can't be bothered. Some may have seen you there and thought you had it under control.

The bottom line is that you did an amazing job. Put in the same situation again, I bet you'd do it again too, despite the nightmares you've had.... because for you, it was the right thing to do.

Don't lose faith in humanity over this. Carry on living life the way you feel is right - you stick to your morals. And well done.

xxx

**Posts:** 54 · by **Newliferules** » Tue Nov 22, 2011 2:50 pm

Echoing the rest.

You saved a life. You're fantastic!

**Posts:** 1058 · by **idiocy** » Tue Nov 22, 2011 3:56 pm

Like the others, I had to respond to this.
What comes to mind is just this : your username sounds pretty ironic considering this (the sort of person you are).

I don't think I've got the humanity question figured out.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xZtadt-LChc

**Posts:** 365 · by **Severijn** » Tue Nov 22, 2011 4:43 pm

Yeah great work shikari! You saved a life and you're a hero! Shame of all those people just driving by... So sad.

**Posts:** 159 · by **Zuriel** » Tue Nov 22, 2011 6:53 pm

First, I want to say thank you for this act of unselfishness. However I also feel it is important to point out that just because these other passersby did not stop, it does not mean that they are lesser people. If all thirty people were to stop...well, that could've been disasterous...I agree that there is something intrinsically not right with humanity...but we can't pass judgement on people when we do not know the reasons / circumstances...

I also feel it is important to note that you, my friend, have allowed yourself to experience something very few people do...you have placed the well being of another before your own well being. That in itself is truly amazing.

As a first responder, the very first thing one is taught is to approach every situation involving "spilled body fluids" as though the scene is contaminated. In todays crazy world, you could have easily exposed yourself to a life taking virus such as AIDS. The way it sounds, that never crossed your mind. Kudos for your love of mankind!

The bad dreams will stop eventually. I think what you need to concentrate on is what DID happen...not what COULD HAVE! I have a daughter and I would only hope that someone would be equally as helpful as you were. Again, Kudos!

**Posts:** 8 · by **AaronArmstrong** » Tue Nov 22, 2011 7:39 pm

Some people are just cold like that as you said, me being one of them. Also, the anonimity people feel in public and especially when driving can be surprising. In large crowds or groups(including being in traffic) people can either feel no responsibility to demonstrate what some would call humane or they may feel that if someone else has passed her and they don't, they would be cast aside from the social norm.

**Posts:** 19 · by **crashyellow** » Tue Nov 22, 2011 7:42 pm

Shikari, your story proves how cold this world is and how cowardly most people are. You, of course, are an exception. I'm not going to make excuses for the drivers who kept on their merry way after they saw the Jeep crash, unlike some posters on this thread have. Fact is, most people just don't care and that's the end of it. You are a hero in more ways than one and it's normal that you are having nightmares because you had a traumatic experience! Simply allow more time to go by and the nightmares will cease.

**Posts:** 8 · by **AaronArmstrong** » Tue Nov 22, 2011 7:46 pm

It's not cowardly to have a cold disposition, some people just can't empathise in the same way if at all as you do, crashyellow.

**Posts:** 19 · by **crashyellow** » Tue Nov 22, 2011 7:51 pm

I never stated that being cold-hearted and being a coward are tangible to each other. Many folks, however, are both.

**Posts:** 8 · by **AaronArmstrong** » Tue Nov 22, 2011 7:55 pm

Hrm, then I don't see how cowardice is a part of OP's story. It's a possible reason, but an odd choice of wording to me.

**Posts:** 9885 · by **Candid** » Tue Nov 22, 2011 11:25 pm

This reminds me of an old adage: The crowd has many heads but no brain.

The driver who has the best view of the accident is so shocked he just keeps driving, trying to convince himself he didn't see what he saw. The next one sees one driver rolling on by and another (you) leaping out to render assistance, so he keeps going too. All of the drivers (except one) are looking to all the other drivers for what's the right etiquette in this rare scenario, and while they're looking they keep rolling on, not disturbing the traffic flow.

Shikari, you were the only one thinking for yourself -- and thinking quickly -- and that tells me you have leadership qualities.

And it could have been worse. If everyone had stopped you would have had a rubbernecking pile-up that could have prevented the medics getting to the scene.

Well done!

**Posts:** 20 · by **datingexpert** » Tue Dec 06, 2011 11:46 am

Hi shikari,

What an interesting topic to post about in the Psychology area of the forum.

I was just reading today in Dr. Stockwell's DENIAL book about with all of the watching of violence that we do in watching modern movies as well as television that we become inured to the seeing and even witnessing of violence.

Perhaps some of that inured energy was there?

What do you think?

No one else stopped...

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