Adult hobby as a last ditch effort

I'm a middle-aged man living somewhere in America, and while far from affluent, I'm doing fairly well for myself. The rent is paid, the fridge is full, and I clearly have the internet. I'm attractive, charming, well-read, quick witted and conversational.

Yet for some reason, women avoid me like I have some type of fatal, virulent illness.

I've answered 30+ personal ads in the past two months and have gotten absolutely no response. Before moving to the west coast at age 34, I had been on four dates in my entire life. Two years ago, I was a FWB with a woman who dumped me because she started to fall for me. I met her at age 39 and were it not for prostitution, she would have taken my virginity.

Which is where the "adult hobby" comes in, which is a horrible euphemism for being a "john." Like most things I have an ambivalence towards it. One one hand, I get to shack up with women that at times look like adult film stars, and they won't say no, and if they do, they at least WILL TELL ME WHY. On the other hand, it's wicked expensive and I will miss out on the "L" word. I'm getting old and feel like I missed out on so much, and I'm also 100% certain no woman will ever love me. None have up to this point, so why would I believe that would change? Has anyone else had this problem?