Recently I was trying to persuade someone that “standing up for one’s self” or trying to convince those who doubt us of the reasonableness or justness of our Opinions is usually a Lost Cause, and mostly because other people don’t care, and are simply bothered by one’s trying to ‘argue’ with them. Yes, I still believe that to be true, but it does come across as very cynical. So I thought about it some more and decided it probably was a bit more Complicated than I had presented it, which is generally the case about such things.
What dawned on me was that People often have different Styles of Thinking, and that the Different Mental Types will then necessarily have difficulty communicating between each other. I was thinking of primarily Two Ways of Thinking – there is the Rationalist Intellectual Way of Thinking which involves Proofs, Demonstrations, Anecdotal Examples, and just plain Logic; and then there is the Emotional Intuitive Aesthetic Way of Thinking where Things are Evaluated largely on how they Make Us Feel.
Of course, an Intellectual can get quite Emotional when presenting his Viewpoints, but this is because he or she may be heavily emotionally invested in their Rational Argument, but in such an event the Emotionality is just incidental. Also we may have Intellectuals who See that a Good Rational Argument bears a kind of Aesthetic all its own (for instance, an Intellectual may say that a certain very fine and well-turned Argument or Solution to a Problem is ‘elegant’). But still the Basis of their Thinking and Decision Making is primarily Rational and Intellectual.
Likewise the Emotional Intuitive Sentimentalist may present his or her self calmly. You see, Emotions do not always have to be all aflutter. So we may have instances where the Intellectual, because he or she may feel ‘threatened’ by the resistance to their Ideas, may be acting out Emotionally, but that the Sentimentalist may be quite collected and calm. So in order to distinguish between the Two Different Mental Types one has to listen long enough to determine how each makes their Decisions, not on how they just happen to be behaving. And making such a determination as to Thought Process is usually quite easy. The Intellectual is necessarily full of Arguments, Details, Logical Progressions and so forth. Often Intellectuals will be so rude as to Interrogate the people they are trying to convince, which only works for them if you give them the answer they expect, but if you don’t they nearly always react poorly (this form of Debate was pioneered by the Philosopher Socrates who is remembered in Plato’s “Dialogues” which were edited carefully enough so that everyone always gave the Answer Socrates was looking for. But the Truth of it perhaps can be better discerned by the Fact that, as we may recall, Socrates was given the Death Penalty by the Athenian Legislative Assembly for being so Rude and Obnoxious). The Aesthetic Sentimentalists, on the other hand, simply has Their Opinion. Usually their “Argument” for anything they value or appreciate goes only so far as to say “I Think it is Good”. It is not just an appraisal based on sheer Appearances, but on an entire range of factors which probably mostly involve how the Thing or Idea can be expected to appeal to their Social Group, or the Social Group to which they aspire. So you see that in such a style of Decision Making that Intuition would be largely involved. But it is nothing that can be Argued With.
So you see, if you yourself are a Rationalist Intellectual and find yourself in disagreement with somebody that you soon discover to be an Intuitive Sentimentalist, then it should certainly make All the Sense in the World for you to Drop your Argument and to admit that Their Opinion does in fact hold a certain Aesthetic Appeal, which it probably does or the other person would not be so convinced of it. To indicate that you still believe what you believe, you can assert that you still believe that your own ideas are ‘pretty’ too. This is kind of like what people mean when they say “Everyone is Entitled to their Opinion” which drives Intellectuals crazy because it seems to say that Being Wrong has the Same Value as Being Right, but to the Aesthetic Sentimentalist, where there is no Rational Test for being Right or Wrong, it makes perfect sense that Varying Opinions may have some a certain equivalent value depending on who is appraising Them for whatever Benefits they hope to expect from Them (how they could Bolster Social Acceptance within a Group, for instance).
Now it may be more difficult for an Aesthetic Sentimentalist to appease an Intellectual once a Difference of Opinion becomes an Issue. Indeed, it could be Problematic if One Aesthetic Sentimentalist takes Issue with another Aesthetic Sentimentalist. You see, while Intellectuals may argue the facts, and on the strength of the facts convince reach a New Consensus (yes, it has been known for One Intellectual to Convince another Intellectual by employing a rational and logically convincing Argument. Arguments among Intellectuals are not necessarily Futile), well , with the Aesthetic Sentimentalists, they can only resort to discussions along the lines of “Is Too!” “Is Not!”, which they really need to resolve by both agreeing that each is “entitled to their own opinion”. The Real Resolution occurs when One or the Other is Cut from the Social Circle. It may be the Case that many Social Groups require a Sameness and Unity in what they Believe In… like belonging to a Fan Club. There is no Real Right Or Wrong, but you can be either In or Out.