How to forget about past

Hello Hulan!

I just wanted to share with you the experience of a client of mine, about the same age as you, who also had a horrendous history of rape and violence, as well as separation from her family. When she first came to see me, she was very depressed, and worried a lot about whether she herself would become an abuser. She was frightened of getting into relationships, because then she might marry someone and have children, and she feared that she would not be able to be a good mother. These thoughts distressed her every day.

One of the main things we did together was to look at the reality of her situation as a child. What can a child do against powerful adults? A child is physically small, and has little knowledge or experience of life. Its needs and wants can easily be ignored. Is this the child's fault? No. It is literally at the mercy of the adults that it encounters - unless the ADULTS protect the child from harm, and look after its needs and wants, the child can do nothing. So although the child may feel terrible about the dreadful things that happened to it, and may think to itself "I must be a very bad child for this dreadful thing to happen to me", in fact the child has nothing to blame itself for. The only thing a child can do is whatever is necessary to ensure its own survival, as best it can with its limited resources. Coming to realise that you have nothing to blame yourself for can help you begin to break free of the influence of the past. The situation you were in was not of your choosing.

I hope this thought helps you, hulan!

Kathleen

why do u want to forget the past?
first thing its *not* there *now*.
u can turn back ur face 180 degree and realize now if u wish
that there is no past
there is only *now*
the moment u r breathing is ur reality. isnt it??
so u r already FREE from it right now...hm??