Depression at university

**Posts:** 2 · by **summerhaling** » Tue Jun 04, 2019 2:38 am

I’m in my first year and finding it difficult to concentrate and fit in. Im scared to make friends or speak in class. Either I sit away from others or hide in the back on the class. I record my lecture so I can listen to them later. Sometimes I’m day dreaming in class and other times I sit there anxiously ready to leave. My children are aged 7 and 9. Both go to school. Sometimes I have to miss lecture to take them or pick them up from school. My husband tries his best to help out when he can but I feel guilt when the kids are going to bed without me tucking them in. Sometimes I have to lock my self in a room to do my work and ignore the kids while my husband is looking after them. I still feel bad for no giving them time. They are quite noisy so I don’t get much done anyways. I can never concenMost time I’m going back and forth from the university, home and kids school. It’s very exhausting. I don’t want to give up but ever since I was prescribed with anti depressants. I’ve been missing more lectures than I would and I feel so tired and not bothered to do anything. I use to enjoy uni but I see it as a burden that’s making me an unfit mother and mentally unstable. All my assignments are overdue and I haven’t started doing them yet. When I have tried to I get distracted easily by thoughts of being unworthy and incompetent . Sometimes I have a few flashes of ways to end my life but I don’t have the guts to. I am my own worst enemy.

**Posts:** 12131 · by **Richard@DecisionSkills** » Tue Jun 04, 2019 3:01 am

summerhaling wrote: I’m in my first year and finding it difficult to concentrate and fit in. Im scared to make friends or speak in class.

It sounds like you are attending uni for the wrong reasons. Understandably, this can then lead to a host of issues.

My guess, correct me if I’m wrong, is that years ago you had a reason you wanted to go to uni but you put it off. Alternatively, at some prior point, the expectation by family or a personal goal was that you attend uni and you made a commitment to go, whether formal or informal. In your mind the goal of “attend uni” was and still is on a sort of “bucket list” of things you want to accomplish in life and so if you don’t follow through then it makes you feel like you are a failure or giving up. And the fact you mention fitting in, suggests maybe there are a mix of social pressures to attend. Possibly a spouse or others have thrown their support behind you and have encouraged you to attend, so you feel the pressure not to let them down.

If none of the above is correct, what is the reason you want to attend uni? What degree are you pursuing?

**Posts:** 2 · by **summerhaling** » Wed Jun 05, 2019 2:01 am

Nursing

**Posts:** 12131 · by **Richard@DecisionSkills** » Wed Jun 05, 2019 3:03 am

A depressed nurse. For now, focus on your mental health. Stop uni for now. When you are healthy again, when you are in a mentally better place, then revisit what you want to do in the future.

**Posts:** 7 · by **JenniferL** » Tue Jun 18, 2019 3:48 pm

Dear Richard,

I really understand you!

I am in depression because of my university tasks...

**Posts:** 198 · by **Prycejosh1987** » Fri Dec 11, 2020 4:31 pm

Break out of that shyness. Every person is unique but generally speaking there is nothing different in human beings. We all have the same needs and wants.

Depression at university

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