This is my first time using a forum but i would like the perspective of an outsider for my very f*cked up situation im in.
My partner and I are moving into our new house in 1 week and to celebrate we all went out with his flatmates and got mindlessly drunk. My current flatmate and best friend came along too, as she had just gotten cheated on by her long time boyfriend of three years with a friend of theirs.
We all had a great night and were drinking and went to a club until I got sick and asked my boyfriend to take me home. My best friend and flatmate said she would come with us too. We jumped in a cab and drove home. Whilst in the cab, I was in the front and my BF and best friend were in the back. Like always my boyfriend was sh** talking the cab driver calling us his bitchez and how he was probably going to have a threesome when we got home (high-fiving the taxi driver) it was done in a typical male drunk banter way that he is known for when drunk. Once inside we decided in our drunken state that we couldn't be bothered making up a bed for my flatmate and that she could just crash with my BF and i as we were all just going to pass out. I being in a jumpsuit striped down to just my underwear and hoped into bed and started passing out. My best friend came up to me and started kissing me and then grabbed my boyfriends hand. I didn't refuse then but the next thing i know i look up and my boyfriend and best friend are having sex right in-front of me.
I say omg get off and tell them that i cant do it I don't feel comfortable and my best friend runs out the room. I am so confused and just cant understand what ive witnessed as I really honestly did not think it would happen. I never got asked to have a threesome i was so drunk i didnt stop it earlier but it was my boyfriend and my best friend having sex in front of me, not all of us joining in.
My boyfriend and I have previously talked about threesomes and I had said I could never go through with one ESPECIALLY not one that involved him and I together.
We were so happy up until that point and I don't believe there was anything wrong at all. Infact I saw myself being with him forever and ever. we had just got our own house together and he would tell me how excited he was etc etc.
I dont know what to do. I feel having removed myself from the situation for a few days that I dont think it was done maliciously. There was a comment made in the start of the night saying that there was sexual tension between my bf and best friend though and I dont know if I have just been blinded by that fact. I dont know if you can call it cheating?, if it was my fault i didnt stop it sooner?, if my boyfriend doesnt love me the same as i love him?, if my friend was the malicious one as she had recently been through heart break and didnt like to see us being so happy?, I dont know what to do? I feel broken and empty and i need help.
This is the most f***ed up situation ive ever heard of/been in and I just dont know what to do.
Please help
connfusedgirlfriend
New Member