by sebas » Tue Nov 01, 2005 6:24 pm
> I know, bad idea already
The only bad idea there is to consider it so. As cheesy as it may sound, the past shouldn't be cared about as long as you love each other. Your previous relationship is over, now there's a new relationship, if coincidentially it's with your ex's mate, or brother, or father, or son... it's secondary, of course there'd be a lot of Chinese Whispers and people judging but who cares, it's your relationship, not theirs.
> I really don't want to know anything about him
You can't flee from your past. You've got to get to a point in which you can run into your ex and don't feel anything. You can't deny his existance and his (very important) performance in your past, therefore, it's time to get over it (and get over it doesn't mean pretend nothing ever happened).
> but the new guy keeps bringing him up
It's just logical, just as you probably bring up your own mates, he does the same. No matter what happened between you and his good ol' china, he's still his mate for what you've said and you cannot change that. You've got to accept your new boyfriend with all of his environment. I don't mean you've got to be friend of his friends whatsoever, but you've got to accept the links he's got with other people including you.
> I have asked him many times to not do that
Try to settle an agreement. Both of you should give each other some time, you must have patience to accept your ex being mentioned often and he's gotta have confidence to slowly but surely fading his mate out of this new stage of everyone's lives. Take it from me, he might be feeling insecure about your feelings for his mate, or he might be feeling odd aboutthe whole idea, especially if for many years he thought of you as "my mate's girlfriend". Be patient. Both.
> I know that this new guy is good but he loves to argue and I can not control my temper
Try to speak with him, dot the I's and cross the T's.