How to care

I'm recognizing a pattern in my life, or so I think. I'm reflecting on comments that first came through my family. From my mother and my sisters. That is that I am a very selfish/greedy person, that I don't care about anyone. For example, I'm very greedy when it comes to money. I don't buy anything for anyone. I'd rather invest it and let it grow. I see it as sensible and practical, not greedy. I have always struggled to say I love you, to anyone. I don't know why, it just never felt right, even as a kid. Growing up, I hated myself and the world that I was in. I had a supportive family I was just the odd one out for some reason...

From a couple of ex-girlfriends, they complained that I don't show them care of any kind. They say that I should know what being caring is, well I guess I don't. I haven't a damn clue. My last girlfriend I'd give her gifts (flowers, her favorite bars, and crap...) and we'd spend time together. But she always told me that I'm a very uncaring person. This really hurt and confused me. She said she expects someone to be checking up on her. WTF, am I your fairy f***ing goddam mother? Grow the **** up. Of course I care about a person's well being and I want to make sure she is ok. But the fact that I have to check up on her all the god damn time is bs.

Anyways, I'm stuck in this zone trying to determine if I'm a caring person or not. If not, how do I become more of a caring person. Can I become a caring person? Also what is the difference between being greedy and caring about your happiness a lot? These concepts sound like one thing. And society decides on a whim that these separate things?!

Thanks for listening...