I made a good decision today!
I had a suprememly stressful day. Actually ended up with a panic attack- the kind you think your heart is going to explode. I had to lay down and put my feet up so I wouldn't pass out. That kind of panic attack.
Once I started to come around, my go-to comfort is to eat (usually cereal) and then purge it. Strange, I know. But there's not much about an eating disorder that makes sense. Something about it just instantly soothes me.
So there I stood in the pantry, pondering cereal choices. Not wanting to do it. I actually hate purging. BUt so strongly compelled at the same time.
And I just turned around and took my anxiety medication, walked out and that was it.
I was instantly proud of myself! Granted it took an HOUR for the medication to kick in. During that time I called on my support team (friends and my therapist) and that helped distract me until the med kicked in.
I did purge once earlier today, but this is the first time since I can remember when I walked away from a purge episode.