the curse of the witch doll

Are you speaking to a doctor regularly?

i am at hospital. yes im speaking to tons of docs

the strange part is they are challennging ms very harsh with my feelings... i thought they should. take small steps

laureat wrote: i thought they should. take small steps

And what small steps are you taking?

i have tried exposure therapy ( facing my fears) as much as i could handle . these guys are pushing my limits on what i cannot handle

I someimes ended doing I dont want to do, and it is kind of scary.

laureat wrote:i have tried exposure therapy ( facing my fears) as much as i could handle

And what could you handle? What steps did you take?

i was out for walks...
i was calling friends out..
i was tring job interviews..
i was dating....

things that i could handle

btw they let me come home. but the drugs they said i need to take.
and i was recomended to go out. ..

somehow i cannot speak fluently, i cannot even walk sometimes.

laureat wrote:i was out for walks...
i was calling friends out..
i was tring job interviews..
i was dating....

things that i could handle

So you are able to control your walks, calling friends, job interviews, and dating. Great!

That seems like a lot of progress from last week when you said you can't control anything.

no i mean i was able to do those befor. not now.

now i can hardly comment . i just have a tooth pain and helping me do it

laureat, I was in a similar space about three years ago, had just got out of hospital full of drugs and believed I couldn't do anything. I remember lying in bed one morning, thinking if I didn't get up then I would never get up again. So I got up and got dressed, very wobbly, and walked to the nearest cafe where I ordered breakfast. There was such a feeling of triumph that I was walking. I felt weird talking to the cafe woman, certain she must be wondering what the hell was wrong with me, but I got my breakfast and I got home.

Point is, I had to force myself to do it.

I'm glad you're home again. That means your doctors believe you're okay (ish) and you need to take little steps. Encourage yourself. Praise yourself for every little achievement. But do push yourself to do things you used to do. And keep 'talking' to us here.

yeah i think in my past most helped me when i chopped the challenges in small pieces. little steps.

i also think it is the pills they gave me
which making me euphoric and chest pressure

laureat wrote:yeah i think in my past most helped me when i chopped the challenges in small pieces. little steps.

That's the way. Praise yourself for whatever you're able to do, and encourage yourself if you start to think you're not doing enough.

laureat wrote:i also think it is the pills they gave me
which making me euphoric and chest pressure

Nothing wrong with euphoric! It sure beats depression.

In my experience with head drugs, then can be demotivating and make you lethargic as well as permanently hungry. Often that's because they've dehydrated you, so drink water whenever you think about it.

not positive euphoria. but kinda abusive euphoria