by hopefulcheese » Sun Jun 04, 2017 9:36 pm
I am not depressed anymore, at least not right now anyway. It still happens once in a while but it's more of a PMS nowadays and goes away after a few days. When I was depressed, it happened for months and all I did was sleep. On the days that I didn't work, I took sleeping pills when I woke up so I can go back to sleep because I didn't want to think about anything - it was making me even more depressed. It was also coupled with anxiety. A therapist suggested that I see a psychiatrist to get meds but I didn't want that because of the possible side effects. I did struggle with it because I didn't have the energy to do anything -- I wouldn't eat, clean my place, didn't even shower for days, didn't go anywhere.. til I had to force myself and started getting myself outside of the house little by little. I can't say I'm good at fighting it because that is subjective. But yea, it was on and off, some days you think you're getting past it and then you find yourself going back into a foul mood... just have to remind yourself to keep pushing forward because you don't want to go back. My motivation at that time was that I will lose my job if I kept letting that happen and I don't have anyone to support me. It is definitely a process, it's not like an on/off switch. Nowadays when I feel down, I am able to handle it because I know I've experienced worse and was able to move past it.