Hello to All,
Maybe the advice that I'm going to ask sounds silly, but I feel in moments so down that I thought I need some fresh advices from people that understand me.Ok. here is the story.I'm a ex ballet dancer and teacher from Latin América, I had a successful Ballet Academy and one day I thought to come to England for Holyday.In my travel I meet a man and fell in love strongly. I thought the only way to continue our relationship was moving to England my self. I gave up my business, and move to England. I'm a person that love to read, love to learn and love culture in general. I moved to my Fiancé parents house (first mistake) and wait until we get married. Then I started to study NLP and Hypnotherpay with some of my savings. His family and my fiancé (now my husband)come from a working-class level, in which they hate studying, and sitting watching television is the only interest they have. Well I thought in start a ballet academy, but I had all the time negatives from them telling me that ballet was not good (I didn't care)and when I started NLP and hypnosis they thought I was crazy and they start to encourage me to work in a Factory...I just get married 2 weeks ago, I love my husband but my interests in life and curiosity to learn make me feel lonley in my new family,nobody share the interest in books that I have and I need to be daily mentally fighting with closed-minded people (Don't take it wrong, they are nice people but with limiting beliefs)...if I want to move from my in-laws house, I need to give up my Hypnosis training that I love!! to be working in a factory and they will be happy!!! And that is not me!! How can I manage a situation, first when I don't have any support and I'm between negative an limiting mind people? and more how to continue my dream with out gave up my studies and don't damage my new marriage??
All advices are welcome.
Gilda
Some advices?
5 posts
• Page 1 of 1
by Gilda » Tue Oct 07, 2003 3:16 pm
- Gilda
by Mark Tyrrell » Wed Oct 08, 2003 10:11 am
Hi Gilda and a big well come to the forum 
It sounds like you are a very gifted and intelligent person. If it is in your nature to be curious and to learn then these needs have to be fullfilled in order for you to thrive as a woman. You ask how you can get your fiance's family to accept your interests. However maybe the best that you can do, for now at least, is accept that they may not. If this is the case are you still prepared to follow them? I suspect that if you make it clear by your actions that you are going to persue your intersts no matter what they think then eventually they will become used to your persuits and be less oppossed-just seeing it as a part of who you are. Have you tried telling them just how important this kind of learning is to you?
Any way keep us up to date with your progress.
Best wishes.
Mark
It sounds like you are a very gifted and intelligent person. If it is in your nature to be curious and to learn then these needs have to be fullfilled in order for you to thrive as a woman. You ask how you can get your fiance's family to accept your interests. However maybe the best that you can do, for now at least, is accept that they may not. If this is the case are you still prepared to follow them? I suspect that if you make it clear by your actions that you are going to persue your intersts no matter what they think then eventually they will become used to your persuits and be less oppossed-just seeing it as a part of who you are. Have you tried telling them just how important this kind of learning is to you?
Any way keep us up to date with your progress.
Best wishes.
Mark
- Mark Tyrrell
- Uncommon Knowledge Staff
- Posts: 492
- Joined: Tue Sep 16, 2003 9:14 pm
- Likes Received: 0
by Gilda » Wed Oct 08, 2003 10:49 am
Hello Mark,
Thank you for your advice, you don't have any idea how fresh is the feeling to hear that exist a lot of people out there with same goals or /and understand you. You know? you are right, I will continue to follow my dreams, even having in mind that I'm not going to be supported...this situation sometimes make me feel sad, because only to be human and have the honour to own a unique brain like ours, and watch people wasting it, using it only to watch "Big brother"
or anything that don't help us to be aware of all the capacity that we have and we can develop..make me feel really sad, and unfortunately maybe for some reason the life is giving me a lesson in acceptance..but.. ok..I let everyone use their brains how they want...but, why then tell me what to do with mine?..
Another point here is that sometimes I feel lonely
because nobody share my views and if I want to be part of the "team" I need to be...watching "big brother" or living a life that is against of my purpose(party, drink,etc)..I know that maybe I'm between the wrong people, because must be people like me out there, I know...I need to be strong 
Thanks Mark again!!
Gilda
Thank you for your advice, you don't have any idea how fresh is the feeling to hear that exist a lot of people out there with same goals or /and understand you. You know? you are right, I will continue to follow my dreams, even having in mind that I'm not going to be supported...this situation sometimes make me feel sad, because only to be human and have the honour to own a unique brain like ours, and watch people wasting it, using it only to watch "Big brother"
or anything that don't help us to be aware of all the capacity that we have and we can develop..make me feel really sad, and unfortunately maybe for some reason the life is giving me a lesson in acceptance..but.. ok..I let everyone use their brains how they want...but, why then tell me what to do with mine?..
Another point here is that sometimes I feel lonely
because nobody share my views and if I want to be part of the "team" I need to be...watching "big brother" or living a life that is against of my purpose(party, drink,etc)..I know that maybe I'm between the wrong people, because must be people like me out there, I know...I need to be strong
Thanks Mark again!!
Gilda
- Gilda
by Roger Elliott » Wed Oct 08, 2003 11:01 am
Hi Gilda
Yes, you need to be strong just now while you follow your instincts about what is right for you. But of course, as you do that, you will meet more poeple who see things the way you do, and who will support you.
And as those around you see how well you are because you are doing what you feel you are meant to do, they surely will be happy because you are happy.
The best of luck to you
Roger
Yes, you need to be strong just now while you follow your instincts about what is right for you. But of course, as you do that, you will meet more poeple who see things the way you do, and who will support you.
And as those around you see how well you are because you are doing what you feel you are meant to do, they surely will be happy because you are happy.
The best of luck to you
Roger
- Roger Elliott
- Site Admin
- Posts: 2821
- Joined: Thu Sep 04, 2003 9:28 am
- Location: Oban, Scotland
- Likes Received: 6
by Mark Tyrrell » Thu Oct 09, 2003 11:34 pm
Hi Gilda,
yes in order for society to 'work' people are meant to largely fit in with the expectations of that society. So, in Ancient Rome it was 'right' to watch violent gladatorial games and to worship many differnet gods, one hundred years ago in Britain it was the 'right' thing for men to all wear hats and now it is right to be interested in what people expect you to be interested in (Big brother....
etc....)
However in order to feel more alive we need to enjoy using our brains in ways which are right for us not just to 'fit in' with others. You don't tell people want to use their brains for which is good and you have a brain, the most complex, sophisticated, amazing instrument in the Universe, to be used.
Mark
yes in order for society to 'work' people are meant to largely fit in with the expectations of that society. So, in Ancient Rome it was 'right' to watch violent gladatorial games and to worship many differnet gods, one hundred years ago in Britain it was the 'right' thing for men to all wear hats and now it is right to be interested in what people expect you to be interested in (Big brother....
etc....)
However in order to feel more alive we need to enjoy using our brains in ways which are right for us not just to 'fit in' with others. You don't tell people want to use their brains for which is good and you have a brain, the most complex, sophisticated, amazing instrument in the Universe, to be used.
Mark
- Mark Tyrrell
- Uncommon Knowledge Staff
- Posts: 492
- Joined: Tue Sep 16, 2003 9:14 pm
- Likes Received: 0
5 posts
• Page 1 of 1