I was reading the new Anger Management book by our new member, Olga Senych (Osenych), and it got me to New Thinking on an Old Subject, that is, how Anger is fuelled by the Adrenaline that starts pumping during what we call “Fight or Flight” situations. Then it flashed on me from maybe close to 50 years ago when I was in University, doing an Animal Behaviour Course and reading Conrad Lorenz. He presented the idea that it is more complicated than Fight or Flight. You see, Fighting can cause so much Damage, with all that Tooth and Claw business, that animals are smart enough to try to avoid it. So most animals use Bluff and Bluster – Lions roar, dogs bark and growl, cats puff up their fur and stand in profile to appear larger, and they hiss like snakes, and snakes hiss like cats, gorillas jump up and down and beat their chest, bulls snort and stomp the ground and kick up dust, and Human Beings get ANGRY – they jump up, make fists, raise their voices, and use all the frightful swear words in their languages lexicon. No, Lorenz did not say that. But it is a good generalization of the principle, don’t you think?
But just because it may be Bluff and Bluster doesn’t mean that there is no significant actual Danger in Anger. You see, in Nature the Bluff and Bluster holds up well enough only while it is Convincing and Confident. But what happens when one of the Animals breaks and runs? The other animal’s Adrenaline goes from Bluff and Bluster mode to that of Pursuit and Fight. That is why they tell people NOT to turn their backs on a Bear, or any Wild Animal that is facing them down. One has to Stand Up to them, and act Large and Confident. Yes, often in Nature you could expect an Animal to Accidentally wonder into another Animal’s Territory. In such encounters, out comes the Bluff and Bluster in both Animals, but Studies have shown that the Out Of Territory Animal is more than likely very willing to back off and away, BUT, they never drop Eye Contact – they maintain a ‘Hostile Retreat’, and typically the ‘Territorial’ Animal will not follow beyond its own Territory. So in the Wild it is recommended to keep facing the Animal, but to back up and away, as the Animal will expect that behaviour and even be a bit relieved by it…. But just don’t turn your back. A lot of People know this in regards to Wild Animals, but they forget that the SAME THING may apply between One Person and Another. So, what if you accidentally violated some Angry Person’s Self-Perceive ‘Territory’ and they get freak out Angry? Well, treat them like a Wild Animal, that is, NEVER turn your back on an Angry Person, as their Bluff and Bluster may instantly snap into Fight and Aggression if they see an Easy Occasion to ‘Pounce’. Often in Spousal Abuse Cases, the Violence occurs when the Non-angry Spouse ‘turns’ and walks away. Sometimes they are attacked when trying to call the police, but it may be actually that they took their eyes off the Angry Person to dial the phone. I remember as a child, I was having an angry fight with a brother, and I turned to walk away – he ran up from behind and shoved me down a fight of stairs! So, Never Turn Your Back on Bluff and Bluster, or the Adrenaline may really turn Nasty!