Women and anger

I used to see my ex wife get angry, so i know how you must be feeling.. sometimes it did not take much for her to become very angry indeed... never really understood why..

i like your user name btw..

Hi thanks for your reply, I've just re read my post and it makes me sound like a right nutter the punching walls bit is thankfully rare now but I do get frustrated quite easily with life, with myself etc

My username refers to a character on a tv show that I'm mad about, sadly not my boyfriend, oh well no harm in admiring from afar

I Love Danny wrote:Hi thanks for your reply, I've just re read my post and it makes me sound like a right nutter the punching walls bit is thankfully rare now but I do get frustrated quite easily with life, with myself etc

:

Na, nobody thinks you are a nutter so don't worry about that! You just get frustrated sometimes, so it is very understandable. I hope you are able to relax more in your spare time to try and accomodate your anger.

Take care of yourself..

from recent research, women "flood" or become overwhelmed by anger slower than the average male, perhaps resulting in some stereotype that women aren't supposed to be angry. You can be angry and be normal. I try to get away from the cause of anger until I know how to better handle it (if I cant get rid of it altogether). Excersize helps greatly too. The book "Emotional Intelligence" is all about how anger works...very interesting. Maybe it might help you. Fare well.

I get really angry; supermarket rage, road rage and just generally putting up with the general public. Modern life is stressful so don't beat yourself about feeling frustrated.

I'm not say women's lib is a bad thing but it has put us women in the situation where we're expected to have it all - that equates in my book to doing it all! I'm currently the sole bread winner and main carer of our child in my little family so when I lose my temper with some BMW arsehole for nicking the last mother and child spot at the supermarket I try to just think what a tosser - poor guy and try to feel smug.

Doesn't always work though so any suggestions welcome!

Actually on that train of thought: yesterday at tesco's saw a middle aged fat couple getting into their car in the disabled parking bay -- totaly not disabled so said "no wonder you're s fat you lazy gits" caused massive offence and felt good for it!

Hello,
I am an angry woman to . I don't think you are a nutter for hitting the walls When I get mad I throw things. Anything It makes me feel better. And Like you I am afraid I will hurt someone one of these days . You are not alone.

hello i love danny & everyone else,

i used to hit walls & wreck my hands regularly, lately i have been slamming my fist down on my table due to high levels of stress. i totally understand what you mean about women being angry & this not being acceptable in society, i have felt like the odd one out because of my anger problems. i do know that i was copying the behaviour displayed by my parents as i was raised in a violent household. a few years ago i was in a very bad place, my anger was uncontrollable & i am ashamed to say that i did lash out at my partner, so if you are having feelings that you might hurt someone in your violent states i would suggest you listen to yourselves & go seek help. i did a year of cognitive behavioural therapy & this helped me greatly, i do still experience phases of being angry but not on the scale that i used to, things have improved for me in that area. so if it is causing you/others problems do not hesitate go seek help either cbt or plain anger management will help.

take care, best wishes to all

Dear I Love Danny,


Hi,

First of all, I want to say that anger is acceptable in NEITHER men or women, it is a self-destructive emotion that makes BOTH men and women unattractive.

Any particular reason for your frustrations or anger? Is it your present situation, or just pent up anger from lots of little things?

I will frankly say what isn't in any of the other replies. Please do not take offence. I know keeping rage bottled up is no good, but neither is self-injury("bloody knuckles"). I stop at yelling, no throwing things around either, we are not two-year olds throwing tantrums, banging our heads, etc.

I am an angry emotional mess myself. Since I do not know the reasons for your frustration, I can only offer general suggestions. Unless this is a constant, ongoing frustrating reality that keeps you perpetually in a state of anger( in that case, the situation must be completely changed), I suggest you distract yourself with constructive thoughts, pamper yourself, and spend time on your hobbies. Do not dwell on the past or the the 'bad' present or the future that will be. I know this is hard because I have been barely successful, it takes a lot of willpower to better ourselves and our lives.

But do give it a shot, 'cos you 're worth it!

PS - And meditate, if you can. It costs nothing but helps a ton