TA...>>transactions help!!

**Posts:** 23 · by **Psyched** » Fri Jul 09, 2004 12:17 am

Heya, Im new to the board and was wondering if sum1 could help me understand TA transactions.

Take a look at the middle column (crossed transactions) now there are two circles, person one(circle 1) and person 2(circle 2) Person one(Adult) does a transaction with person 2(Adult) but i want to know why that arrow goes to the Adult ego state n not the others? Is this what person one expects the person 2 answer back with? Or do all transactions start with the one ego state pointing to the same ego state? Then person two replies in a parent ego state but why to the child? expected response or actual response from person 2? Although why is there a responce if communication has been cut off? Sorry if ive confused ne1 with this! Any help is appreciated, thanks

**Posts:** 5816 · by **Michael Lank** » Fri Jul 09, 2004 5:24 am

Hi psyched,

Welcome to the Forum.

I can't help with your query, but I thought it might be helpful for other users to give a brief explanation.

TA is transactional analysis - which uses a model of human communication that says that we each have 3 'ego states' - Parent (P), Adult (A) and Child (C).

**Posts:** 24 · by **Paul Myszor** » Fri Jul 09, 2004 11:53 am

An interesting question. In the game playing senario both are aware that a game is being played and are probably consenting to it (adult to adult communication). There are two seperate transactions taking place simultaneously but these are mutual and reciprocal. In the crossed senario there is miscommunication as the two players are mismatching each others ego states and there may be limited awareness, if any that this is happening.

Generally TA is a very helpful paradigm and has lots of worthwhile insights. I recommend Claude Steiners: "Achiveing emotional literacy" which uses TA thinking to promote more emotionally healthy communication between people.

Paul Myszor

**Posts:** 23 · by **Psyched** » Fri Jul 09, 2004 8:59 pm

I don't really understand that! could you provide an example of a short conversation to illustate your ideas, i think that may help me understand it better. Thanks

**Posts:** 2 · by **Simbad** » Tue Aug 03, 2004 8:18 am

Hi Psyched,

I believe you have the transaction the wrong way around. Maybe I could use a conversation to explain your diagram.

A son goes to visit his mother he doesn't see too often. The conversation is started by the mother (2nd person adult state) "Oh, you remembered where I live then?"
This parent state is trying to transact with the child state of the son (1st person child state), the normal child response would be to apologise for upsetting mother. The pararenting adult ego wants to make the child feel bad. But the first person doesn't respond with the child state, he responds by moving up to the adult state. The adult response would be "So you miss me then mother?". This is a crossed transaction, the parent state is trying to transact with the child state but gets a response from the adult state. This brings the parent ego down into the adult state.

This is my understanding of the diagram you have posted.

Regards,
Sim

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