I don't even know where to start. I'm 23. I've been an alcoholic since the age of 18. Binge drinking 5 - 7 nights a week. I was always an odd person in high school. I only had a few close friends and didn't do much. I did track for the first 3 years of high school. My senior year is when i really noticed how depressed i was. I slept in until noon and forged notes most days. I still sleep 10+ hours a day and up to 15 on weekends. I failed out of college 2 times and recently stopped going to classes again. I have a broken ankle sustained during a night of drinking which has kept me basically in bed. I feel much worse during the winter months.
3 weeks ago I quit drinking because of the pain meds im on for the ankle. I detoxed threw up like crazy and felt like crap for a week. A month ago my gf of nearly 2 years left me and she has a new bf already. Im emotionless to it. I loved her very much but I didn't cry or feel anything. Since I stopped drinking I feel a lot worse. It takes me hours to fall asleep and I can't stop thinking about how I'm a terrible person.
I dont want to get out of bed. I dont want to make food. I don't eat most days and when i do its just enough to keep going. I basically stay in bed all the time. I have no insurance and dont even know where to look for help. I dont know what to do so I figured I'd ask here.