It hurts

It's understandable that you would choose a grandiose reason for your suffering. You'd be better off talking to a therapist about your grief and rage.

Dear Sub

All of the most successful Therapies for Anger Management are sourced from or branch out of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, where the Patients are encouraged to self-evaluate their Thinking for indications that they are condoning and augmenting their own tendencies toward Anger, and if they do catch themselves mentally prepping for Anger, the patients are then encouraged to offset and replace such Negative Thinking with Positive Thinking or Thinking that Disputes the Logic and Utility of the Angry Thinking that they catch. Then there is the Behavioral Aspect of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Patients are instructed to take care to note whenever their Behavior results in Unhappy Consequences. Are they taken by surprise by such Unhappy Events? Could they have foreseen the Unhappy Results? Then they need to fall back into the Cognitive Track of thinking out Cautions, Plans and Remedies in regards to such Behaviors. If you are following me, then you probably get the idea by now.

What you are doing is Encouraging your Anger. In effect you are hosing Gasoline into a Fire. You are finding intricate and convoluted excuses for your Anger. And you are being Very Melodramatic about it. We often get ‘Drama Queens’ here on the Anger Page – people who find Anger the Perfect Occasion for Playing out Big Scenes. But you are Positively Messianic about it. You think that your Hate and Bitterness is other people’s Saving Grace. You want to Save the World with your Hate and what you seem to imply will be a Rampage of Violence. You could possibly be Dangerous! I DO hope that you are only fantasizing. Or making Scary Speeches because they are so much More Dramatic than Rational Talk.

Now, earlier in your Post you mentioned about how Anger Builds Up and that It Demands a Release. That is true only up to a point. You see, in every case of Anger, the Intensity peeks very soon after the Trigger Event and then the Anger subsides. For most people, an Anger Episode has lost most of its Energy to disturb us after 3 days. Yes, it can go on much longer if the Person actually keeps focused on the Anger and exaggerates it, and spends all of his or her time in plotting revenge. But for people who simply want the negative feelings to go away, well, 3 days is all it takes, and the first day and night are by far the worse. Of course, I always worry about Angry People who are in High Stress Jobs or Relationships, because often such people are not Allowed to go a full 3 days from one Anger Episode without Triggering up Another and Another. In such a case where the Stress Levels and Triggers don’t seem to ever let up, THEN one can say that the Anger might build to a Big Explosion. But such high levels of Stress are not ordinary. Additionally, with only a brief acquaintance with the Principles of Anger Management, Chronically Angry People can quickly learn not to Accept every Trigger that comes along. Again, it is one of the Basics of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy – learning not to ‘take the bait’ for everything that we ‘used to’ find provocative or annoying.

Anyway, if you have come to this Page for Support, well, you won’t get it from me. I believe you are all wrong about how you Think about Anger, and that such Thinking will end in Harm to yourself and probably to others. But if you are here for Help… well, I noticed that you didn’t ask for any. Apparently you Like your Anger and you came here seeking our Approval. Maybe you are delusional too. Ordinarily we tend to believe the Content of what our Posters are telling us. Yes, of course the details are always shaded for their own benefit, but we take it for granted that the Stories are Substantially True. I suppose we might have to think about reviewing that Tacit Policy. Where the Anger is Self Encouraged and Augmented with Obsessive Scheming and even Messianic Delusions of Grandeur, then we need to wonder whether the ‘factual Presentation’ is not just an extension of the other exaggerations and delusions.