Disability & Depression

Hi Relentless,

Welcome to the Forum, nice to hear from you.

You've clearly been through a hard time.

As you say, depression can be of uncertain duration, but there are things that can be done to limit the duration and to take control of it, rather than it controlling you, you might like to look at the Depression Learning Path, which gives useful information on depression and how to be free of it.

Yes, clearly permanent disability is permanent, and for people not born with a disability (I don't know if this applies to you) there can be an appropriate sense of loss for the mobility that a person used to enjoy.

However, there is not a causal link between disability and depression - many people with a disability are free from depression, but it is common for people who are depressed to think that it can never be shaking off.

Whether able bodied or disabled it is important that people's Basic Human Needs are met. I wonder if there are there any that you feel could be improved in your life?

Best wishes

Thank you for your response Michael. I have viewed the provided links but I suspect, in fact I know, I am past caring.
I was not born disabled, the usual everyday life, I became disabled and did not suffer depression until the wife left the home and took the child with her, abusing my disability to further her selfish dreams. This was about 12 months ago.
In 12 months I have barely left my home, never had a bath/shower, seen my home fall to pieces, have no idea where my child is and my health is declining rapidly. I have powderised all my medication and I am resolved to kill myself on the childs birthday. Since I will be disabled until the day I die I see no end to this and doubt I will see the child ever again even if I did 'hang in there'. It is simply asking too much of a disabled man to expect to live alone on one meal a day, wearing filthy clothes and living in a dump reliant on occasional help from a friendly neighbour. I have made a new will providing as much security as I can for the child and that is the best I can do.
Permanent disability means permanent abuse until the day I die. No Escape from that fact.
12 months existing like this would be 12 years equivalent for able-bodied people.
12 years of Pot Noodle every night alone waiting for your health to finish you off ??

Sounds pretty grim, Relentless.

You don't say how old your child is. What do you think your child will make of it if you decide to go ahead and end your life? Having a disabled Dad is quite a challenge for a kid. Having a disabled Dad who also took his own life could be too much to handle.

I understand from your posting that you are not past caring about your child, as you have made provision in your will for the security of the child. Kids need more than material security. They also need some emotional security.

I do not underestimate the painful difficulty of your situation, I am merely trying to say that there are important reasons for keeping on living, and finding a way through this dreadful pit you are in now.

Do you have carers coming in to help you?

Kathleen

Thank you for your response Kathleen. I believe this child and doubtless the mother who will benefit most from my will can regard themselves lucky I simply do not burn everything I possess. I may still do so.

Because I am disabled I have never spent a minute alone with this child and I've never once held this baby/child in my arms. Knowing that the bitch mother killed me on the childs birthday and her child will never have a father is my ultimate revenge and solution to this problem.
Disability removes all other conventional escapes and remedies.
I am disabled and depressed until I die and I will see this through to the death. This is not merely depression. This is mental and physical cruelty to leave a disabled man alone to live life like a dog. This dog will bark on the childs birthday.

Hiya
Revenge is a powerful motivator indeed however
Consider this
As children we may be separated from our genetic parents
As adults we choose to be next to the people we want next to us
Therefore
If you are emotionally by the side of your child when it
Graduates
Gets that first job
Marries
Has children of its own.
You will always be in a winning position as the other parent will see you smiling with your child no matter what the other parent does your there and your child is smiling back at you. is this not permanent and total revenge
If you take your suggested rout you will not be there so no one will see you no one will hear you no one will realy care no one that is but the child yes your child who will have to deal with life without ever getting the chance to know you
Just a thought