Can you offer advice?

**Posts:** 3 · by **Musical Love** » Sun Apr 28, 2013 12:30 am

I want to be a performer, public speaker, or musician, but find it incredibly difficult to deal with stage fright.

I am in a public speaking class now. My first speech was fantastic, second horrible, and third even worse. The few seconds before a speech, I rack up so much nervous energy that when I speak, my thoughts get completely blocked. I say things that don't make sense for example, I was 10 minutes in to a speech and said "and that's how this goes" concluded the speech halfway through and ruined my presentation grade in a college course because I was sweating like Shaq at the free throw line.

I have to conquer, adapt, or learn to use stage fright to my advantage, but don't know how to do it. This is important because I am at an age where my career needs to start and I am not going to be held back. Because of my location there are no classes e.g. (toastmasters, etc.) to work on leadership abilities :/

Should I use CBT techniques to try and squash my public speaking fear or force more experience upon myself? I don't know where to start it's frustrating that some of us are afraid of such a ridiculous thing....

**Posts:** 33 · by **deemark67** » Mon Apr 29, 2013 8:06 am

How frustrating! You obviously have the ability - like everyone does - because you said your first speech was fantastic. Did you go back and analyse what made it so good? That would be a good exercise to do.

I imagine that because you're 'expecting' not to do well, it sort of becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy and your subconscious takes over and doesn't let you succeed. That's what needs to change. It might take a while, but I really believe you can overcome this - I believe this because I overcame huge shyness to be a confident speaker/performer!

Try to focus on the positive results; analyse why it went well; try to repeat the good parts, focusing on them.

Also, before you present, spend a few minutes deep breathing. This helps you feel calm. And it helps you slow your pace so you don't trip up over words as much.

I know all this sounds easy...and I know it isn't, but if you're determined to do it, keep trying. Practicing in private and in front of the mirror is really helpful - a bit embarrassing at first, but a really great way to overcome these problems.

Hope this helps.

**Posts:** 3 · by **Musical Love** » Mon Apr 29, 2013 10:40 am

That was a motivational response. Never tried practicing in the mirror, that could prove to be helpful. Thank you for your response and wise words.

Cheers,

**Posts:** 36 · by **Wilfred** » Mon May 06, 2013 3:48 am

Hi Musical Love,

Well you have certainly ended at the right place here.

I can help in lots of ways but lets just deal with the practice.

Great to do in front of a mirror.

And if you do, applaud yourself for the bits you get right and ignore what you get wrong.

The even better practice is to speak with the television on, the dog, the kids and anybody else that’s there.

Practicing like this will enable you to end up stopping worrying about the audience reaction.

After all, no real audience is going to be that disinterested.

Will add more soon

Regards

**Posts:** 33 · by **deemark67** » Fri May 10, 2013 7:46 pm

I like that addition Wilfred - great idea!

**Posts:** 52 · by **legacyinthemakingmagazine** » Wed May 22, 2013 5:10 am

Wilfred wrote:Hi Musical Love,

Well you have certainly ended at the right place here.

I can help in lots of ways but lets just deal with the practice.

Great to do in front of a mirror.

And if you do, applaud yourself for the bits you get right and ignore what you get wrong.

The even better practice is to speak with the television on, the dog, the kids and anybody else that’s there.

Practicing like this will enable you to end up stopping worrying about the audience reaction.

After all, no real audience is going to be that disinterested.

Will add more soon

Regards

Hey Wilfred,
Really a helpful idea for all of us here..

**Posts:** 37 · by **success256** » Sat May 25, 2013 2:14 pm

Hello!

Are you memorizing your speech may be because of it you feel apprehensive.

Concentrate on choosing your subject wisely and close to your heart.
Relate to it add your experiences and just be excited and eager to share this with your listeners.

For reaction speak of it in front of people so that you know their reaction and can also change your presentation to have a better impact.

Change your mental and emotional attitude.

To your Success!
Shaheda

**Posts:** 18 · by **Sandeeps11** » Sat Jun 01, 2013 12:31 pm

Yes this will be applied in any way, But at a time it comes natural...

**Posts:** 52 · by **legacyinthemakingmagazine** » Mon Jun 03, 2013 8:23 am

Musical Love wrote:I want to be a performer, public speaker, or musician, but find it incredibly difficult to deal with stage fright.

I am in a public speaking class now. My first speech was fantastic, second horrible, and third even worse. The few seconds before a speech, I rack up so much nervous energy that when I speak, my thoughts get completely blocked. I say things that don't make sense for example, I was 10 minutes in to a speech and said "and that's how this goes" concluded the speech halfway through and ruined my presentation grade in a college course because I was sweating like Shaq at the free throw line.

I have to conquer, adapt, or learn to use stage fright to my advantage, but don't know how to do it. This is important because I am at an age where my career needs to start and I am not going to be held back. Because of my location there are no classes e.g. (toastmasters, etc.) to work on leadership abilities :/

Should I use CBT techniques to try and squash my public speaking fear or force more experience upon myself? I don't know where to start it's frustrating that some of us are afraid of such a ridiculous thing....

Hey Musical Love,
I would like to suggest you to just think positive and say stop to your negative thinking and nervous energy..You can say it aloud to you that will work more effectively..

**Posts:** 56 · by **Chau Nguyen** » Tue Jul 16, 2013 2:26 am

Musical Love wrote:I want to be a performer, public speaker, or musician, but find it incredibly difficult to deal with stage fright.

I am in a public speaking class now. My first speech was fantastic, second horrible, and third even worse. The few seconds before a speech, I rack up so much nervous energy that when I speak, my thoughts get completely blocked. I say things that don't make sense for example, I was 10 minutes in to a speech and said "and that's how this goes" concluded the speech halfway through and ruined my presentation grade in a college course because I was sweating like Shaq at the free throw line.

I have to conquer, adapt, or learn to use stage fright to my advantage, but don't know how to do it. This is important because I am at an age where my career needs to start and I am not going to be held back. Because of my location there are no classes e.g. (toastmasters, etc.) to work on leadership abilities :/

Should I use CBT techniques to try and squash my public speaking fear or force more experience upon myself? I don't know where to start it's frustrating that some of us are afraid of such a ridiculous thing....

How many hours of preparation did you commit before you delivered your speech?

**Posts:** 12 · by **briandbarton** » Wed Jul 17, 2013 5:34 pm

Musical Love,

First, realize that the stage is yours, and that the people are there to watch you. You are in a vulnerable state by being in front of everyone yet, you are the courageous one.

Second, whenever you have an opportunity to speak, take it, whether it is in front of one person or 100 people. Take advantage of those opportunities. The more prepared you become the better and more confident you will be.

Also, keep it simple!

The World is your stage, you control the outcome. Embrace it.

**Posts:** 18 · by **hypknowtist** » Wed Jul 17, 2013 11:06 pm

Here is something I have learned from toastmasters that some people find better than acting into a mirror.

Get a video camera and record your speeches. You'll see when you are sloppy in form, and you'll hear when you are boring. Now go find resources on body language, and how to say it, and keep recording until you get something great!

The point is, once you get comfortable watching yourself (and showing others) on film, you'll have more confidence on stage, and you'll have a bunch of learning resources.

You might just find your recorded speeches are so great... you'll upload them to youtube and start a new business venture!

**Posts:** 15 · by **orfray** » Sat Jul 20, 2013 10:22 am

How to get over stage fright...

Maybe you could try and find easier challenges, so as to get where you want to get step by step. Could you find opportunities to do very short public speeches, maybe only one sentence or two like a toast in a party? Get yourself a success or two, however small, and take it from there. You'll love it...and move forward.

Another tip is: If you get nervous before speaking, don't try to take your mind away from the fear. Feel it, don't try to think "It''s gonna be alright" while biting your nails. Think "I am scared to the bones" while biting your nails. Because it is the truth. That way, you give your "subconscious mind" a precious information which is the quantity of energy you need to muster in order to overcome your fright.

Take it easy and have fun !

**Posts:** 12 · by **briandbarton** » Sat Aug 17, 2013 6:31 pm

Dont be afraid to lose yourself in the moment
@briandeonbarton

**Posts:** 36 · by **barazchris** » Thu Sep 05, 2013 10:04 pm

Hi Musical Love, i respect you goals
but you must not give up just do what do you have to do
search and find the anwsers learn tricks and tips
youre first speech was great !! you are made for this
and i agree with deemark67 Try to focus on the positive results
Good luck

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