im 24 female I suffer from clinical depression ,low self esteem and anxiety. I have a past of quitting jobs and relationships sometimes for no reason . Im currently unemployed and I barely have any friends. I push people away or have no desire to build friendships.
Im currently in a relationship with a man that is a sex addict but I'm living with him because i love him but also depending on him for financial stability. I feel i have a impulsive personality i spend money all the time and never save.I put myself in these situations i coddle moved out and saved money but I'm just too dumb and irresponsible.
Yesterday i thought about suicide I have no passion or motivation .I feel lost and confused almost numb.I wake up everyday with a cloudy feeling lifeless and depressed.I struggle with low self esteem issues and self image.Pretty much I'm a mental freak show. I have anxiety with meeting new people and dating .I finally scheduled an appt to see a psychiatrist this week but I'm afraid nothing will help me any advice or just encouraging words will help .Sorry I feel like a sad victim complaining about life .I know people are in worse situations then me .