Hi,
I struggle with anxiety related problems. Recently i came to know about Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. It is helping me to some extent. But i want direct help on how can i solve some anxiety issues which are troubling my life.
I have social anxiety especially when i go to a family gathering where there are know or unknown relatives i feel somewhat anxious not knowing how to behave n worrying if they notice there is something wrong with me..
I also allow people to walk over me. I have had time where people telling me you are no good at this work in office... and i didnt had the courage to reply back to them... or people calling me names or making fun of me... in front of others... but i didnt had the courage to stop them or anything ....
what would you suggest some exercise or book i should follow to get rid of above problems.
In office also i feel anxious ... if i start reading some material not related to work i get tensed up thinking what if my manager catches me doing something other than office work... what if he asks me about status of current work...
This thinking always worries me to extent that i keep doing office work and dont do anything else..
Please suggest some exercises and self help materials.
Setting healthy boundaries
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by betawarrior » Mon Apr 25, 2016 9:59 pm
It seems you experience fear of confrontation. When someone says something disparaging to you, you react by trying to avoid confronting the person. And in front of your boss, you're afraid of how he might see you. To avoid any kind of confrontation with him, you try to appear to be the perfect worker. Likewise, I'm assuming, in front of your relatives.
For your fear of confrontation, I would try this exercise. Imagine someone is making fun of you in a way that is bothering you. Ask yourself: What am I risking by not saying anything back? What consequences will happen if I don't set boundaries? Really consider the consequences and write them down. Think about them. Then, whenever someone says a remark to you, think about those consequences in your mind.
For your fear of confrontation, I would try this exercise. Imagine someone is making fun of you in a way that is bothering you. Ask yourself: What am I risking by not saying anything back? What consequences will happen if I don't set boundaries? Really consider the consequences and write them down. Think about them. Then, whenever someone says a remark to you, think about those consequences in your mind.
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