"My life is in the hands of the next person stupid enough to make me mad"
This seems to quanitfy my life at this point. I am constantly angry down inside and wanting to have something to erupt at. But I usually target rude or obnoxious people.
Today, I let a situation evolve and erupt in the local airport until the local authorities were called. All I had to do is keep my mouth shut and let another jerk insult me or others and everything would have been fine.
If anyone knows of a way to let go of caring and anger, please share it.
Tinman
new to system but furious
3 posts
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by san » Fri Jul 23, 2004 7:02 am
If anyone knows of a way to let go of caring and anger, please share it.
LET GO...!!!
All I had to do is keep my mouth shut and let another jerk insult me
N-O-B-O-D-Y can insult you unless YOU accept it!
Its YOU... i say again that its YOU who DECIDE to accept it or not!
If anyone knows of a way to...
If u can understand the logic carefully..u want a way or a method to get rid of anger?
BUT a way (or a method) imply TIME and MEANTIMEu remain the same;
and at the end u find urself same as u were.
UNIVERSAL TRUTH: there is NO 'step by step' way.
Its NOW or never?
so one may ask...
how to drop it -now?
well that 'HOW' means TIME!
if you can understand this...you are free RIGHT NOW!
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by Mark Tyrrell » Mon Jul 26, 2004 1:22 pm
Hi Tinman
As you have noticed chronic anger causes you and others all kinds of problems. Certain changes occur when you become enraged. Firstly the pumping efficiency of your heart becomes impaired and drops by about 5%. This causes tiny rips in the lining of the arteries leading into the heart-which begins to narrow the arteries. This is why having an angry style of relating to life is such a big predictor of later ehart problems (a bigger predictor even than smoknig).
When we are angry things like self conciousness and uncertaintly disappear. We humans hate uncertainty and most people find it difficult to relax and be cool with not having an immmediete and definite reason as to why someone said or did something. So angry peope jump to conclusions, they see reality in very fixed all or nothing terms: 'I am completely right; you are completely wrong!' etc.
We become angry because basic human needs are not met ( see: http://www.uncommonknowledge.co.uk/emot ... being.html
If we haven't slept, ate, had attention needs met or feel our status has been undermined then back ground stress levels can rise to such a point that they can easily spill over into an angry tantrum.
Some people just learn they can more easily get their own way when angry however anger tends to corrode relationhips. Anger, like any emotion, locks and limits perception and narrows the focus of attention to extreme degrees. Because of this people are conditoned through anger and find that their 'buttons' start to be pushed more easily in the same way that a dog instinctively learns to salivate when it's master is near because it has come to associate them with food!
Perhaps what would be useful would be to ensure as far as possible your basic needs are met. You need to think about and learn possible alternative responses-ones that keep your and others dignity and health intact and I would suggest you need to learn how to relax so as to develop more flexibility.
Best regards
Mark
As you have noticed chronic anger causes you and others all kinds of problems. Certain changes occur when you become enraged. Firstly the pumping efficiency of your heart becomes impaired and drops by about 5%. This causes tiny rips in the lining of the arteries leading into the heart-which begins to narrow the arteries. This is why having an angry style of relating to life is such a big predictor of later ehart problems (a bigger predictor even than smoknig).
When we are angry things like self conciousness and uncertaintly disappear. We humans hate uncertainty and most people find it difficult to relax and be cool with not having an immmediete and definite reason as to why someone said or did something. So angry peope jump to conclusions, they see reality in very fixed all or nothing terms: 'I am completely right; you are completely wrong!' etc.
We become angry because basic human needs are not met ( see: http://www.uncommonknowledge.co.uk/emot ... being.html
If we haven't slept, ate, had attention needs met or feel our status has been undermined then back ground stress levels can rise to such a point that they can easily spill over into an angry tantrum.
Some people just learn they can more easily get their own way when angry however anger tends to corrode relationhips. Anger, like any emotion, locks and limits perception and narrows the focus of attention to extreme degrees. Because of this people are conditoned through anger and find that their 'buttons' start to be pushed more easily in the same way that a dog instinctively learns to salivate when it's master is near because it has come to associate them with food!
Perhaps what would be useful would be to ensure as far as possible your basic needs are met. You need to think about and learn possible alternative responses-ones that keep your and others dignity and health intact and I would suggest you need to learn how to relax so as to develop more flexibility.
Best regards
Mark
- Mark Tyrrell
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