I'm 24 years old gurl, single, happy independent woman that never been in a relationship before.
But lately, theres one guy that is attracted to me and seemed really wants to get closer to me. He is nice, kind, soft, good looking, like he's overall perfect. We have met a couple times, having chit chat, and chill time. i think he wants to get me more deeper in our relationship. The weird thing is, eventho i kinda like him for his kindness, eventho he's all perfect and our conversations always flow perfectly, i still feel numb towards him, like theres no butterfly effect in my stomach when i met him, and whenever i met him, i always feel anxious, pressured, worried, and im afraid if one day he would confess his feelings and wants me as his girlfriend. During that time, it kinda makes me so sick physically. I've been losing appetite, nauseous, been overthinking and stressful thinking about what happen next, what happen if he will be my boyfriend, and worrying how if i lose my freedom. I know it sounds crazy and and i realized that this is abnormal thing to ever happen. I don't even know what i want and what should i do. I can just cut him off, but on the other side i dont wanna lose him because i know that i am lucky that some perfect-nice-humble-good looking guy attracted to me. I kinda want him, but sometimes i just want to be alone and single. It all felt just like i have double personality which is tiring. And my physical sickness when i met him (or even when i don't meet him) is tiring as well. What happened to me? Am i having dating anxiety or having fear of commitment with someone? How can i cope with this?
My past relationship history: i am cold hearted woman who don't easily fall in love with people. I have several guys who ever attracted to me, At first i don't like them at all but the way they treat me makes me catching feelings on them but when i have crush back on them, they're leaving and gone.
Why do i get so anxious and sick when someone likes me?
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by Richard@DecisionSkills » Fri Nov 05, 2021 1:19 am
lovesig wrote:I'm 24 years old gurl, single, happy independent woman that never been in a relationship before.
My past relationship history: i am cold hearted woman who don't easily fall in love with people.
So in simple terms, you are “frigid”.
I use quotations, because it is a loose interpretation. It isn’t a judgment. It’s pointing out you are, by cultural standards, either sexually inexperienced (a virgin) and possibly considered older for marriage. Culture has a big influence on this concept.
Might you get anxious or sick, because you fear what is expected of you? You are supposed to remain pure until marriage, but you are 24 and inexperienced. There is a lot of pressure. You feel trapped. You are in a no win situation. The older you get, the more a man expects that you will have some experience and this increases the pressure to avoid the man.
No need to answer, but consider…
To what extent are you sexually frigid (a virgin)?
To what extent do you believe in no sex before marriage?
To what extent are you afraid of a man not enjoying sex with you?
To what extent has your culture or marriage stressed the ideal marriage?
Again, I’m not actually asking these questions. I’m only proposing that you become anxious because of how you were raised.
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by Livetowin » Sat Nov 06, 2021 2:40 am
I think if you actually get physically sick thinking about having a relationship, then you need not pursue one. Its not good for you and clearly it won't be in his best interests either. Relationships are work even when both sides understand how to express themselves. If you covet your single life, then make sure this guy understands that. If he wants to move on, then that is his choice to make, not yours.
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