Hey all,
I am seeking some words of kindness/wisdom/clarity…………
About 30 days ago my girlfriend had a full on psychotic break….a few weeks before that, she started displaying symptoms but I was unaware as to what was happening and was wrapped up with a busy work schedule, life etc.
When this became full blown she began targeting me for all of her issues and accusing me of the most outrageous things. It started with accusations that I was remotely controlling and tracking her movements on her computer and her phone….no matter how much proof I could give her she wouldn’t believe…She then moved to I was doing drugs-heroin(I DO NOT DO DRUGS)…she was convinced I had stashes of drugs throughout the house…..again could not convince her otherwise… We then moved to I had installed cameras in the walls, bugs in her clothes and all her electronic devices, tracking devices in her car.stashing drugs for transport in her car, hired men to follow her, drugged her and had my way with her while she slept….video taped and sold copies of every time we had sex and the list goes on and on. Absolutely none of this is remotely true. She tore apart the inside of her car, computer, and electronic devices….in search of these imaginary drugs and tracking devices/bugs……..she cut one of her car seats into 9 pieces looking for these items. Tons of suicide threats, the whole deal.
She started to constantly verbally assault me and call me things I have never been called before in my life…it hurt and it was brutal. I didn’t know how to handle this in the heat of it and I would lose my cool as well and we would have the most heated arguments, I said things I shouldn’t have and feel extremely bad for losing it like that…but I lost it, I was traumatized, confused and crushed…..I had to leave for a weekend to take my son who lives with his mom on a camping trip for cub scouts………..I returned to a house completely torn apart and Alison gone……she would not answer my calls for a while, I was later relieved to find she had ran to her mothers house…….I have not seen her since and her texts and calls completely stopped…..we tried getting her to hospital but she was not having it, at least she is at her moms place safe.
I don’t know what happened to trigger this but I cant help but feel guilty and blame for some of it…She targeted me out of everybody…..I cant think what I did to get her going like that…..I have been beating myself up daily……I went from being the “love of her life” , best friend, lover etc…. to being the most horrendous person on the planet……….. The thing is I still love her and would take her back if she could get this under control…..I know the person underneath all of this and she is BEAUTIFUL inside and out.
Her daughter blames me for being partially responsible for this as well which really hurts like a bitch…her daughter later told me of her moms history of being hospitalized which Alison hid from me the whole time.
We are both in our forties, I felt like I was babysitting an irate 15 yr. old…..We both have BP but I take my meds regularly and exercise, eat right……….she stopped meds, smoked pot with her brother and didn’t really take good care of herself…..I went to my therapist before we started seriously dating…to see if she would recommend 2- BP’s dating she was fine as long as we strictly followed our regimens, supported each other and stayed healthy……
Im just looking for some support because I am truly alone, confused, broken heated and traumatized….anybody ever experience this before…….is this my fault somehow???? I am so messed up over this, I haven’t slept well for a month, cant eat etc…………I don’t know what to do or how to feel.
Partners Psychotic Break
3 posts
• Page 1 of 1
by McCain » Tue Jun 09, 2015 7:36 pm
First off, you've already answered what went wrong. She stopped her meds and began recreation drugs. Bottem line.
Unfortunately it sounds like she is a drug addict, as well as mentally unstable.
When a person goes into a fit of psychosis and is fixated on paranoid delusions of drugs, there is usually a connection. You were not the intended target to begin with. You , hypothetically speaking, are just a witness to the accident
Think of it like this.. When a person is swimming with another person and they begin to drown, the first thing they do is panic (sheer mania ) . If your the other swimmer, you can help or you can go get help.If you decide to help there is a great chance, that if you don't know what your doing, you'll be going under next.
In a state of psychosis, mentally, it feels just the same as drowning. A person is no longer in a state of reason or empathy. You cannot try to make sense or fix this with conversation or your personal reasoning.
If your going to make this work, then you will have to set the ground rules.
1. Get a second opinion about her diagnosis. The psychiatrist needs to know she is using street drugs.
2. Seek help through the psychiatrist for drug addiction recovery.
3. Let the doctor know about these manic states. I personally think she may have more than one issue, and that excludes the drug addiction.
4. Don't hide anything! The less you tell your doctor, the less accurate the treatment.
5. Don't forget to take care of yourself and your mental well being.
Lots of people give themselves " half treatment ". They tell a little, leave alot out , end up putting their meds to the side to self medicate, and then wonder why nothings getting better...
Regards McCain
Unfortunately it sounds like she is a drug addict, as well as mentally unstable.
When a person goes into a fit of psychosis and is fixated on paranoid delusions of drugs, there is usually a connection. You were not the intended target to begin with. You , hypothetically speaking, are just a witness to the accident
Think of it like this.. When a person is swimming with another person and they begin to drown, the first thing they do is panic (sheer mania ) . If your the other swimmer, you can help or you can go get help.If you decide to help there is a great chance, that if you don't know what your doing, you'll be going under next.
In a state of psychosis, mentally, it feels just the same as drowning. A person is no longer in a state of reason or empathy. You cannot try to make sense or fix this with conversation or your personal reasoning.
If your going to make this work, then you will have to set the ground rules.
1. Get a second opinion about her diagnosis. The psychiatrist needs to know she is using street drugs.
2. Seek help through the psychiatrist for drug addiction recovery.
3. Let the doctor know about these manic states. I personally think she may have more than one issue, and that excludes the drug addiction.
4. Don't hide anything! The less you tell your doctor, the less accurate the treatment.
5. Don't forget to take care of yourself and your mental well being.
Lots of people give themselves " half treatment ". They tell a little, leave alot out , end up putting their meds to the side to self medicate, and then wonder why nothings getting better...
Regards McCain
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by lifeonpluto » Thu Nov 10, 2016 12:46 pm
Hi , if you still need any advice I am a female and I went through a psychotic episode just like that. Except i accused my girlfriend of such things, like doing drugs in the house and sneaking people in and cheating and delusional things went through my mind as i was "flesh" and my girlfriend was "spirit". shes in an altered state of mind right now and she will not listen. i spent like a week psychotic until i had to undergo an emergency hold which turned to 14 days and then to a month and 11 days until i was finally released. the doctors at my location were shitty and just prescribed medication rather than explain the condition.
Psychotic episodes can be cause by biological (if somebody else in the family has mental health disorders), psychological, and sociocultural aspects. Just be wary of the hospital she's placed in and make sure you and the patient know rights. Highly recommend to really try to get the best hospital you can get through your insurance. i was transferred to college hospital costa mesa and it was THE WORST EXPERIENCE. but at least when i left I no longer experienced delusions and paranoia. It was like I was myself again-only it was only the beginning of depression and now i am diagnosed bipolar. Childhood trauma or stressful experiences may also lead to a psychosis.
From the person who experienced similar crazy events such as believing i was going to save the world, that music and media were delivering messages to me to barging into my crush's house thinking she was being raped only to find her brother there alone, but in the erratic state of mind that i was at i checked every single door in the house. in my delusional state i believed she was somehow locked somewhere inside. this was the day i was hospitalized a few hours later on emergency hold. Please its been 2 years since this has happened to me. it was feb 8 2015 ,but i am still in the process of learning and recovering. I hope your partner is doing better now, let me know if you wanted to know anything else. -ADRI
Psychotic episodes can be cause by biological (if somebody else in the family has mental health disorders), psychological, and sociocultural aspects. Just be wary of the hospital she's placed in and make sure you and the patient know rights. Highly recommend to really try to get the best hospital you can get through your insurance. i was transferred to college hospital costa mesa and it was THE WORST EXPERIENCE. but at least when i left I no longer experienced delusions and paranoia. It was like I was myself again-only it was only the beginning of depression and now i am diagnosed bipolar. Childhood trauma or stressful experiences may also lead to a psychosis.
From the person who experienced similar crazy events such as believing i was going to save the world, that music and media were delivering messages to me to barging into my crush's house thinking she was being raped only to find her brother there alone, but in the erratic state of mind that i was at i checked every single door in the house. in my delusional state i believed she was somehow locked somewhere inside. this was the day i was hospitalized a few hours later on emergency hold. Please its been 2 years since this has happened to me. it was feb 8 2015 ,but i am still in the process of learning and recovering. I hope your partner is doing better now, let me know if you wanted to know anything else. -ADRI
- lifeonpluto
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