I was first diagnosed with depression last July, when I was prescribed Citalopram and started seeing a psychiatrist on a weekly basis for CBT. In January, I was admitted to a psychiatric hospital following a suicide attempt. During my time in hospital, I was tapered off Citalopram and am now taking Venlafaxine and am (thankfully) feeling much better. I discharged myself from hospital after two weeks, against medical advice but with the support of my family. I am now back at work on a part-time basis and am still seeing my psychiatrist, though on a less frequent basis.
My time in hospital can only be described as the worst time of my life. I would do anything to avoid being admitted again. But I'm concerned that if I relapse and either have suicidal ideations or attempt suicide again, then I may be sectioned. I want to be able to trust my psychiatrist enough to tell him the truth about the way I feel, but he refuses to guarantee that I won't have to go back to hospital. Does anyone have any advice?
Hospitalisation
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by Pollyanna » Tue Mar 09, 2004 3:55 pm
I whole-heartedly agree with you about never wanting to be hospitalized again. At times that is my primary goal. I can also understand your not wanting to tell your doctor how you feel. Please try to believe that the doctor will put you back in the hospital only if you seem to be in danger of harming yourself (or others). YOU may not be the best person to make that call. YOU do know how you are feeling and whether you are capable of working on your problems outside the hospital. YOU are the BEST judge of that. I think you can trust your doctor to want what is in your best interest. Tell the doctor how you feel and assure the doctor that you will do whatever it takes to stay out of the hospital. Let the doctor help you stay out of the hospital.
I wish you the best....
I wish you the best....
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by Claire » Wed Mar 10, 2004 12:09 pm
Thanks for the advice, Pollyanna. I do try to believe that the doctors only want what is in my best interests, but when that involves being under 24 hour observation on a psychiatric ward, it makes you doubt it. At the time, it was probably for the best that I was admitted, and I am certainly glad now that I did not take my own life. But I'm sure there must be some better way of dealing with depression than putting already depressed people in a depressing environment with a load of other depressed people. I also found that it was very hard to get discharged since I could never get to a point while I was in hospital that I could honestly say I was no longer suicidal - so in the end, I just lied, and assured the doctors that I was no longer suicidal, just so I could get out of there!
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