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Why exactly is this thing bothering you so much? Admiring a body of a beautiful woman is not the same as being sexually attracted to her. You like guys. Do you want more to decide whether your bi or not or to get into a relationship with somebody, maybe a guy as you said that you are more attracted ...

You say two weeks, when did it start exactly? You might locate what triggered it or who did it

Otherwise/in the meanwhile, do something that makes you feel good, safe, happy, relaxed, go for a walk, get distracted, meditate. See what makes you feel better and keep doing it until you feel good.

Maybe in a private message if you're really interested, otherwise I would have to write a book here instead of a post and my blog with some useful resources is still under construction/translation. As for knowing that dwelling is causing the feeling, I don't see how it could be true if one's thought...

As for a decent college and a decent job, this is more who you want to become and what you want to do. My question was a bit different: what do you want to create, how would you love to contribute, what services would you like to deliver? It was more about the result of your activity and profession,...

In the meanwhile you might want to make them talk about why they consider it such a bad hobby, without protesting, just try to fully understand their reasons, it might give you more bargaining ideas. There are other ways to bargain and to get what you want... but maybe later in a private message.

If you do question their authority (I'm not saying you should tell them that or show them that, keeping that in mind is enough) and if you do think that they are not always right in their judgement... Can't you play chess elsewhere? When you are not at home? Do you really need their permission and a...

While I agree that a calm mind makes better decisions, who says that a mind that tries not to dwell on thoughts is a calm mind? Not necessarily. It might take time or it might never happen because one isn't ready, patient or disciplined enough. There are easier ways.

I do understand psychology and all the underlying mechanisms of the case. I guess I just prefer my own solutions which I find more efficient & time-saving; they permanently remove the underlying reasons fueling those thoughts, so there's no reason one's mind shouldn't be calm in the first place.

If it is a minor problem I agree, if it is just one problem, yes, but what if one lost someone he/she loved after, say, 30 years together and every single thing triggers thoughts about that person and what if one is broke and everyday he wakes up and that is a major issue, his future depends on that...

And what if one keeps not dwelling on it, accumulates, keeps not dwelling, accumulates... And after a while has so many of those triggering thoughts that 90% of his energy is engaged in not dwelling on it?

You might want to make a deal with them: if you perform well at school, keep playing violin then they will let you play chess, at least from time to time at the beginning. Ask them if they love you and want you to be happy and if this is something that makes you happy would it be so horrible if you ...

Do you respect your parents? Do you ever question their authority? What is their background? What are their achievements? And what do you want to get and achieve in your life? Not what you want to do, but what results you would love to get, that would make you proud if yourself? And it doesn't have ...

Or perhaps you are trying to control your feelings way too much. You do have the right to feel whatever you feel, even if others do not understand you and even if you don't know why you feel that way. There's always a reason I don't know your story and your background. There are different patterns. ...

I agree, eliminating triggers is another way out

The question is if one will be able to remove all the potential triggers. Our memory is based on associations, one trigger leads to the other, sometimes there are too many of them everywhere

If one forgets one might end up making the same mistakes over and over again or getting in similar situations with similar people without knowing how to solve the problem. Why not trying to figure out what's bothering you behind them & what to do in order to avoid that similar things will ever h...