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havent been on in a long time which is a good thing. I had read your comments a while ago and rereading them still see that you yet again hold good advice and wisdom motivated, as do the others who have posted responses. Things have been ok, mild, nothing shocking. I got up to vermont for a few days...

update-help- this is the first night real deep depression has kicked in again. I had been sad lately on my disapointments but was coming out of the previous depression. Right now i feel hopeless. My stomach feels empty but i cant eat. I feel like breaking down but i cant. I am exhausted, its 2 am an...

thanks for the continuos help motivated update- i got my second chance... and i f***ed it up. Im really angry at myself for it. One of them actually asked to hang with me i didnt ask him and we had been playing soccer together on some days too. We ended up getting everyone together to play basketbal...

Update. Past few days no one has wanted to do any thing but today an old freind said he would come over After two hours late I texted him and he said he had to do something but would be good in 30 min. It's now four hours almost since the original time and he hasn't answerd in half n hour. Not only ...

update- its been getting more bearable at least. Just finished my last final thank god! Havent had to turn to this site in a week or so which is a big progress. Hung out with an old freind again the other day but i dont think we will ever be real close. Im not really sad today because i just finishe...

good news... the first of that in a long long time. Had a great day today. Best day of my entire year beyond a shadow of a doubt. Did bad on my finals in school then no one answered me to hang out out of 8 people but it didnt matter. One of them who i dont ussually hang with called me up and we went...

In my ideal life i would be fine with lviing where i live now, it would be nice and cool but hot enough to still swim haha. I would have a good core group of freinds that i could hang with what ever like i used to and we would chill just about every day. We would play some handball, football, some s...

thank you for the response motivated and i also do not get along witth my family. Infact i am thinking about telling my mom i cant live here anymore and that im going to take up her suggestion to go move to vermont with my grandpa (who is my rolemodel and is the person i love most in the world) and ...

also i do go out of my way to talk to the unpopular kids sometimes so dont think im a really self centered person my issue is really just my self esteem and i dont know how to get it back

i need somone to either approve or veto my new direction of trying to detach from them all.. I just deleted my facebook and im hoping that next year i will have the chance for a fresh, or at least better, start so i can enjoy my life next year... should i be doing this? if i try to keep connected wi...

Thank you for the good insight there and alot of that makes sense to me now but the issue is exapnding my circle of freinds. I have tried calling and hanging out with numerous people. Three different groups of people. Kind of four even. However the end result has always been the same. Everyone says ...

please respond to what i should do in my previos post -i have another big question should i just tell them "listen i know you guys dont rele wanna hang with me so ill stop f***ing calling u and stuff" etc etc etc and just finally give up on it, or try again at least? i think it might be go...

its friday... ****... i mean the weekends are the worst part of my week and thats why its so hard to keep living. I have nothing to look forward to, nothing to be happy about. People were saying we'd hang today, but they already wont answer. I need to get better at not texting them. Its almost impul...

i know its about perspective and ive read books before about child soldiers and im not going to sit here and ignorantly say i have it worse than them but it is also about mental feelings. They have really f***ed up lives but its a different kind of f***ed up for everyone with depression as opposed t...

i mean sh** this is supposed to be when im enjoying life, the best years of my life, and they suck, what does that mean the rest of this torture will be like? Im supposed to be out getting girl friends and hanging with friends and going to parties and im not doing any of this crap. I think my damn m...